


"Waiter, there's too much salt on my fries!"

by Sinnamon_Troll, Username8746489



Series: Can you put 'Time Traveler' on a resume? [1]
Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir Bashing, Alya Césaire Bashing, Bunnix fixes everything, By forcing her time assistant to do it, Gen, Lila Rossi Bashing, M/M, Miraculous Multiverse, Salt Universe, class salt, salt salt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-13
Updated: 2020-06-01
Packaged: 2021-03-02 23:08:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 22,912
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24154858
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sinnamon_Troll/pseuds/Sinnamon_Troll, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Username8746489/pseuds/Username8746489
Summary: You know, with infinite time lines there's gotta be one where things go wrong right?Like say, a timeline where everyone became enchanted by a lying girl pretending to be a foxOne where the most generous of people can be made out to be a monsterPeople can only be pushed for so long before they breakHowever a certain Rabbit Has no intention of letting this story end in a tragedy
Relationships: Friendship - Relationship, Marc Anciel/Nathaniel Kurtzberg, Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug & Nathaniel Kurtzberg
Series: Can you put 'Time Traveler' on a resume? [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1790128
Comments: 336
Kudos: 725
Collections: MarcNath Fics!





	1. Nathaniel, Saltiest Spy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a parody of all the Salt! Fics floating around. This is all meant to be in good fun, and any similarities to other fics are either because the same situation has been used many times across many fics OR pure coincidence. To reiterate, this is not an anti-salt fic and we're just trying to have fun here.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” Nathaniel muttered to himself, standing in an alleyway. 

He was watching the Ladyblog live stream, (Good old reliable Alya), on his phone, waiting for a certain someone to appear.

Alya was standing on the street, a safe distance away from the fight. The akuma was Mr. Banana, turned into a giant marshmallow man who wanted the world to eat donuts? Jeez, Hawkmoth was really running out of ideas. 

The camera focused on the superhero duo. 

Chat Noir jumped back to stand next to Ladybug on a roof, “Well, m’lady, it seems we have a sticky situation on our hands!”

They both dodged a marshmallow clump thrown at them.

Ladybug turned to smirk at her partner, “It’ll only be on yours if you can’t keep up!”

He gasped, “You wound me! How will I ever recover from this attack to my pride?” As Chat Noir talked, he spun his baton to shield him from the sweets being thrown at him.

Ladybug giggled, calling out her lucky charm to try and end the battle.

It was at that moment Nathaniel heard a noise behind him. He turned around to face the source of the familiar sound.

Bunnix stood there, leaning against the wall, “Hey bitch.”

Their friendship had started when she accidentally opened a portal next to him during one of the earlier akuma attacks. Bunnix couldn’t just leave him there with that information, so she took him into her burrow. He stayed there until the Akuma had been purified, and Nathaniel thought that would be the end of it. Until literally the next akuma attack, when she appeared and asked if he wanted to help her with an "Errand". And he'd been dragged across time and space ever since. 

He rolled his eyes, “Is this gonna be another mission where you force me into a maid dress?”

“That was one mission!”

“That lasted two weeks,” Nathaniel grumbled under his breath.

Bunnix grabbed him and dragged him into her burrow, closing the portal behind him. 

He could already see the other him tied up to a chair in the corner, staring at him with wide eyes, a bandanna stuck in his mouth. There was a muffled cry of confusion from the boy.

"You know, you'd think after awhile you'd get used to seeing yourself tied up."

Bunnix patted his back, not caring, “You know the drill, right?”

Nathaniel nodded, having seen this exact situation multiple times before, (The other Nathaniels and/or Alixs usually understood once the situation was explained, although he would prefer it if Bunnix didn't have to tie them up), “Get in, find the problem, help Ladybug!”

She smiled, “Yep! Don't worry! I’ll get you out if you’re about to be killed or beaten or whatever!”

“Um, you still haven’t told me _how_ to help her?” Nathaniel pointed out as they started walking towards one of the windows peering into the various timelines.

“Oh...” She shuddered as if the timeline had murdered her family, “You’ll see when you get there.”

“W..What exactly does that mean?”

With a simple push from that damn Bunny, he was flying through the open window. She waved him off with a cheerful smirk on her face, “Have fun!”

He landed face down in the alleyway. If he didn't know better, he'd say he was back in his world. Nathaniel scrambled off the floor, turning back to where the portal was, “WHAT DOES THAT-” 

He cut himself off, and with a flash the portal was gone. 

"...Mean" Nathaniel huffed, "Ok, step one, Ladyblog." He pulled out his phone to see what was going on with the heroes. 

Chat Noir was leaning over Ladybug, using the current fight (Seriously? Still Marshmallow man?) to his advantage, “Ladybug, give me a kiss!”

She tried shoving him away, “Chat, focus on the fight!”

Nathaniel grimaced just watching it.

“Just give me a kiss and I’ll go away!” The dense cat purred.

“Chat, For the last time, I don’t like you that way!” 

Chat whined, leaning on her more, “But, m'lady! We’re meant to be together, we’re soulmates!”

She looked up at an incoming blast of pastry, ducking downwards, letting Chat Noir get struck by it, pinning him to a nearby wall.

Ladybug, relieved to be free of her persistent "partner", called out for her lucky charm, finishing the battle and restoring the city quickly. 

As Ladybug was reassuring a confused Mr. Banana, Chat Noir started pouting and stomping the ground, “Ladybug, why’d you let me get hit?!”

“You wouldn’t have gotten hit if you were paying attention!” Ladybug snapped back. 

“Well, I would’ve paid attention if you had just listened and gave me a kiss!” Chat Noir screeched, “If you would stop being so stubborn, we would already be together!”

Ladybug screamed before swinging away.

The blonde huffed, crossing his arms, “She’ll love me one day. I know it.”

Mr. Banana just sat there, looking horribly out of place.

Nathaniel shut off his phone, walking out of the alleyway towards class.

It’s not like school could be any worse than what he just saw.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was written by Username8746489!! (AKA me!)


	2. Nathaniel and the Saltiest Class

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter by Sinnamon Troll! Nathaniel starts to learn just how bad this universe really is.

School was worse. 

Much Worse. 

Almost as soon as he entered the school, the Alix of this timeline waved him over to the group she was standing in.

“Nathaniel! Great timing! Alya just came up with a great way to let Marinette have a taste of her own medicine.” She said, an eager gleam in her eye.

“Oh?” He asked, pretending to be interested but inwardly puzzled. Marinette needed to ‘taste her own medicine’ in this universe? What had she done?

“So here’s the plan. Marinette always goes home for lunch because she lives basically next door to the school...but she leaves her bag here. I say we take her designing sketch book and tear it up! Maybe then she’ll finally know how Lila feels every time she gets bullied by Marinette. It’s time that brat learned some humility!” Alya explained excitedly. Nathaniel felt a cold chill run down his spine as he observed the manic glee in his classmates at the thought of destroying one of Marinette’s most precious possessions. Even sweet, gentle Rose was smirking in satisfaction. He was getting a sinking feeling he knew why Bunnix had sent him here. There was something _seriously_ wrong with this universe. Were his classmates under a curse? Were they possessed by akumas? Nathaniel had seen a universe like that before, where your akuma personality stuck around in your head after your were cured, but those akuma had been helpful to their hosts and mischievous at worst once freed from Hawkmoth. This was downright _evil._

The warning bell rang for class, and Nathaniel trailed behind the group as they excitedly whispered and planned. They filed in right past Ms. Bustier, not bothering to stop their conversation, but the teacher did nothing. Just stood there and smiled. Nathaniel got annoyed sometimes with his own version of Ms. Bustier not interfering when she should, but even she would say something to students who were plotting to destroy someone else’s belongings right in front of her. Nathaniel took his seat in the back (hoping that was actually his seat in this universe) next to Lila silently.

“Good morning, Nath!” She said, syrupy sweet. Nathaniel cringed.

“Uh, morning Lila.”

“What’s wrong?” She asked innocently, catching his flinch and looking concerned.

“Sorry it’s just...maybe don’t call me Nath? I only let my close friends call me that, and you’re nice and all but we don’t know each other that well.” He said gently as he could, not wanting to cause a scene. Silly him. Lila, not causing a scene.

“W-what do you mean, we’re not that close? You told me to call you that when I started writing your comic for you after you got rid of that awful, possessive cousin of Marinette’s!” Lila said, looking like she was gonna cry. Nathaniel froze. Marinette’s cousin? His writer? Marc?! The him in this universe had ‘gotten rid of’ Marc, his BOYFRIEND, for LILA in this universe? Even if they weren’t dating here (he had seen universes where they weren’t. The one where Nathaniel was married to a pure white avatar of destruction cat god was one of the weirder ones, but there were normal ones to where he and Marc were just friends but-) but even so what had happened to make him replace the best writer in the entire school with _Lila_ who had the lowest grades in everything, including writing. Lila had said Marc had been possessive? Nathaniel’s thoughts spun out of control, wishing Bunnix had given him a _little_ bit more to work with with this Nathaniel’s life.

“I mean, um,” The red head started, glancing away from Lila’s expectant look. “I just...I thought we’d try it out but I don’t really...I’m sorry. It’s not you! I’m just...not ready for that?” He bullshitted, thinking on his feet. Lila narrowed her eyes at him, and he panicked. Remember your acting classes! Blush and look away! Let her draw her own conclusions! Blushing! He needed to think of something to fake a blush...he conjured up an image of _his_ Marc smiling sweetly and kissing him on the cheek this last Valentine’s day when they had exchanged gifts. Ah, that cute little smile, the way his eyes crinkled and his face turned away shyly after the kiss...so _cute_.

Lila’s intense stare smoothed out into a smug look, briefly, thankfully taking the bait as she relaxed her pose. “I’m sorry too, I shouldn’t push you if you’re not ready! We’ll be working together a lot, so we’ll have all the time we need to become closer friends.” She said, placing a hand over his with what anyone else would think was a winning smile. Nathaniel just felt his breakfast recoil in disgust. Great. Now Lila thinks he has a crush on her. Better than blowing his cover this early, he sighed to himself.

The final bell rang and Marinette skidded into her seat, out of breath. Nathaniel noted that her seat was next to Chloe for some reason, while Sabrina was sitting in Marinette’s old seat. Nathaniel wondered when THAT had happened, unless that was normal here…

“Tardy again Marinette. I’m going to have to talk to your parents. Again.” Ms. Bustier sighed in disappointment. Marinette hung her head and didn’t say anything. Ms. Bustier shook her head and began the lesson.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Nathaniel kept an eye on the clock, leg bouncing from nerves, until he couldn’t take it anymore. It was almost lunch and this was the best plan he had come up with all day to prevent the coming disaster. 

“Ms. Bustier!” He said, raising his hand.

“Yes Nathaniel?” She called on him.

“I really, _really_ need to go to the bathroom. Please can I go?”

“Nathaniel it’s twenty minutes to lunch. Are you sure you can’t hold it?” the teacher frowned.

“Please Miss I REALLY need to go. It’s an emergency!” He pleaded.

“I think it really is Ms. Bustier, he’s about to bounce a hole in the floor with his foot.” Lila helpfully pointed out, smiling at him. Whatever, he’ll take help where he could get it at this point.

“Alright, but come see me once lunch starts so we can go over what you missed.” 

“Thank you!” He said, running out of the room. 

Once safely down the stairs, he looked both ways and beelined it to the locker room. Opening what he hoped was still his locker, he breathed a sigh of relief to see ‘his’ things in there. Grabbing the pile of sketchbooks inside, he was delighted to find a new, blank one sitting on top. Moving quickly he went to Marinette’s locker (also thankfully the same as in his universe) and opened it. The school had a bizarre policy against locking things (they didn’t want students to be able to ‘hide’ things from them) so there were no locks on their lockers. Ironically. He easily found Marinette’s designing book and eased her custom cover off of it with a mental apology, placing it on the blank book and then back in her bag. Not willing to trust his luck, he placed her design book into his own bag that he carried with him, and shut the locker door. With one more quick glance around to make sure he wasn’t seen, he made his way to the bathroom to maintain his cover story.

“Now we just have to hope they don’t notice the book is blank…” he muttered to himself.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Thankfully this class seemed to be as brain dead as they were mean. Lunch came, and after his meeting with Ms. Bustier Nathaniel grabbed his own lunch from the cafeteria and ate as fast as he could, before returning to the classroom to watch events play out, and intervene if needed. Lila hadn’t returned yet so Nathaniel had the desk to himself. Which was good, he wasn’t sure he could bluff his nervousness away this time. Ten minutes until lunch was over, Alya rushed in holding a familiar pink covered book.

“I got it!” She exclaimed. The rest of the class eagerly gathered around her. 

“Time for Marintte to know what it’s like to be bullied.” Kim said, grabbing one end of the book.

“Yeah. Hopefully once she knows how it feels, she’ll stop.” Ivan said, taking the other cover. 

“Pull! Pull! Pull!” The class chanted as the two powerhouses did just that. The spine creaked, before giving out in a shower of paper that the others grabbed at with a fervor, laughing as they shredded the white pages into confetti. 

“Pile it on her desk so she sees it right when she walks in.” Sabrina instructed, laying the two halves of the cover strategically so they would be the first thing seen. Nathaniel felt sick just watching, even though he knew the book was fake. They all looked so _happy_ doing this. He couldn’t even begin to imagine what they thought sweet, kind Marinette must have done to deserve this. Bunnix wouldn’t have sent him to help someone who had actually done something terrible...right?

“Shhh! Here she comes!” Alix, _Alix_ , hissed with a smile as everyone rushed to their seats. It hurt seeing his best friend like this. He really hoped there was some sort of external factor here and everyone wasn’t just naturally evil. 

Marinette walked into the classroom alone, shoulders slumped, looking tired. She walked with her eyes on the floor until she reached her desk and froze. With a shaking hand, she reached out to touch the torn cover, then lightly dragged her fingers through the pile of shredded paper. 

“H-how?” She whispered so softly Nathaniel strained to hear her.

“Karma is how.” Alya sneered. Marinette whipped around to face her, angry tears in her eyes.

“WHY?!” She screamed.

“Because you needed to know how it feels! This is what you’ve been doing to Lila the entire time she’s been here!” Alya shouted back. “You’re a bully and you deserve this! We’d all be happier if you just disappeared!” When Marinette drew inward in defeat instead of yelling back, Nathaniel suddenly knew _exactly_ what the worst case scenario was he was here to prevent. He’d seen that look before in the mirror, before his life had turned around this year. That look of tired defeat. The look of ‘they’re right, maybe I _should_ just disappear’. To hell with working from the shadows on this. 

“The book was fake!” He shouted, standing abruptly. 

“What?!” Alya snapped, turning to face him. He ignored her and jogged down the stairs, digging into his bag. When he reached Marinette he offered her the book he pulled out.

“This is the real one, I switched it with one of mine when I heard what they were planning. Please don’t listen to them. The world is a MUCH better place with you in it.” He pleaded, hesitantly placing a hand on her shoulder.

“Nath what the hell!” Alix spat, stomping up to him. “Why would you do that?”

“Why would I do this? Why the hell would you guys do THAT?” He questioned, pointing at the pile of paper. “I don’t care what you think Marinette has done, that’s just _wrong.”_

“What’s gotten into you? She needs to learn her lesson!” Kim butted in, chest out like he was going to start a fight. Nathaniel put Marinette behind him and stood his ground.

“About what? What it feels like to be shit on for no reason? Like Chloe has been doing to her since elementary school? Or like how you’ve been doing the same to _me_ for years?” Nathaniel shot back, not backing down even when Kim got in his face. “ _No one_ deserves to be bullied, and I can’t imagine what evil parasite is eating your brains to make you think that Marinette, the sweetest, kindest girl the class, would ever _sneeze_ at someone, let alone bully them!” 

“You’re the one with brain worms dude! You’ve seen how she’s always after Lila, calling her a liar! Stealing her things! Pushing her down the stairs!” Nino interjected from Alya’s side. 

“Lila IS a liar you idiots! You think she actually knows all the people she says she does? Where’s the proof?” Nathaniel threw his hands in the air in frustration. 

“Where’s YOUR proof she’s lying? Oh that’s right you don’t have any because she’s NOT!” Alya shouted back.

“What’s going on here?” The group turned to see Lila and Adrien standing in the doorway. 

“Who cares, _move.”_ Chloe said, pushing past them. She paused when she saw the mess on her and Marinette’s desk. “Oh what have you idiots done _now_?” She groaned in annoyance.

“Is that your sketchbook Marinette? What happened?” Lila gasped in fake concern. 

“We WERE trying to let her have a taste of her own medicine so she would know how you feel and leave you alone, but Nathaniel got abducted by pod people or something and decided to ruin it.” Kim hissed, raising a fist. The red headed boy didn’t even flinch. In his time as Bunnix’s assistant, he’d faced down worse, wearing less. He wasn’t afraid of _Kim._

“Oh no...Marinette…” Adrien shook his head. “You brought this on yourself. I told you to leave Lila alone.” He said, sounding disappointed. Marinette said nothing, just clutching her sketchbook to her chest and giving everyone a bewildered look. Nathaniel had had enough.

“Come on Marinette, we don’t have to stick around these assholes.” He fumed, grabbing her by the wrist and dragging her out of class just as Ms. Bustier was coming in.

“Where do you think you two are going?” She asked.

“Somewhere where people have more than one brain cell between them!” Nathaniel called over his shoulder, not stopping. He led Marinette into the locker room, intent on letting her get her things before taking her home, when suddenly she yanked her wrist out of his hand. Next thing he knew she had him by the front of his shirt pressed against the lockers. Holy crap she was _strong-_

“Who are you?” She demanded. Nathaniel panicked. 

“W-what do you mean? I’m Nathaniel.” He sweated. Looks like someone in this universe knew how to use their brain after all,

“Nathaniel is afraid of his own shadow and would never be able to stare down the entire class without flinching like that. So I’ll ask again. Who are _you_?”

Oh boy.


	3. Nathaniel and the Saltiest Epiphany

With all the universe hopping Nathaniel did, it was easy to forget how strong Marinette really was, even without the miraculous. It would’ve been easier if she just pinned him to the lockers, but _no,_ she was keeping him off the ground by at least a foot.

“Marinette, I really am Nathaniel!”

“Liar!” She screamed, hands tightening on his shirt, “ _No one_ in our class cares about me!”

Ouch, that was a sucker punch to the _gut_.

“You’re either the result of an akuma or someone else! Who are you?”

Nathaniel grabbed her wrists, “Marinette, I will explain, but you need to put me down.”

“How can I _trust_ you?” Marinette asked, staring him directly in the eyes. It felt like she was judging him for all his sins.

“I helped you, didn’t I?” He reasoned, “Your sketchbook would’ve been gone if not for me.”

“You could just be playing the long game. You’re friends with me one day, then the next, you’re watching as our classmates push me down the stairs.”

...That sounded like it was from experience. 

This timeline really was fucked. 

“Marinette, I swear I will explain everything, but please put me down.”

She didn’t answer, continuing to stare in distrust.

Fuck.

\---

Bunnix turned away from the window peering into the timeline shortly after the two left the classroom. She faced the boy she had bound, “So. Do you believe your class was in the wrong now?”

Nathaniel shifted uncomfortably in the ropes tying him to the chair, “I mean...It was wrong that they tore up her sketchbook, but they did it for a good reason! Marinette’s been tormenting Lila for such a long while now.”

The adult blinked, before looking away, muttering sharply under her breath, “Holy heck, you all are so _dumb._ ”

Bunnix turned back to him with a quick turn, “What will it take to get you to realize that isn’t normal? People normally don’t _bully_ other people even if it’s for a good reason!”

Nathaniel was about to retort before a person with several feet of black hair wearing a skull mask (holy shit) jumped through a hole made suddenly in the walls of the burrow.

Bunnix screeched, “THAT IS THE SIXTH TIME THIS MONTH! STOP DISRUPTING THE TIME-SPACE CONTINUUM!” 

“I wouldn’t _be_ disrupting it if you stopped kidnapping my boyfriend for your missions!”

She made a noise of utter exasperation, before looking back to the window, “Oh shit. Kelpie, take care of this alternate Nathaniel. Don’t worry, you can detransform. It’s not like your superhero identity exists in his universe. I gotta do something.” Bunnix didn’t look back before jumping into the portal.

Nathaniel squeaked as the hero (according to Bunnix) looked at him.

The guy was wearing a green skin tight suit with dark green accents on his torso, upper arms, and lower legs. The suit tapered off into fingerless gloves near his hands and there was a yellow diamond design on his chest.

He shut his eyes as the male approached, “I’m sorry for any sins I may have committed. Just please don’t kill me! I don’t want to die!”

The footsteps stopping right in front of him. He heard a small snicker before the person started full out laughing. 

Nathaniel peaked his eyes open, staring at the guy laughing directly in his face.

Rude.

“Wow, you are nothing like my boyfriend!”

“B-Boyfriend?”

“I’ll explain later!” The guy walked around him, starting to untie the rope, “I’m Kelpie. Holder of both the snake and horse miraculous!”

“You can hold more than one?” Nathaniel questioned, flexing his arms once the ropes fell.

“Oh, yeah, that’s a thing you can do if your mental fortitude is good enough.” He heard a loud noise from behind him. 

Nathaniel spun around in his chair to see what the source was. He was met with the sight of Marc standing there, guiding something into his hoodie pocket.

“M-Marc?!”

He smiled and shrugged, “Not yours, anyways.”

Nathaniel simply blinked in surprise.

Marc leaned on the chair, “So tell me more about your universe.”

\---

Bunnix landed behind the girl holding Nathaniel against the locker, “Marinette.”

She turned back to the adult, “B-Bunnix?”

“You can trust him. He’s with me.”

Marinette blinked before slowly lowering Nathaniel to the ground. 

“I keep forgetting how strong you are even without the ladybug miraculous,” He muttered, straightening his back.

She blinked, “L-Ladybug miraculous? That’s so strange! Why would I-”

“You don’t have to lie,” Bunnix cut in, “He already knows.”

Marinette stopped her fountain of words from spilling out of her mouth, turning to Bunnix, “He what?”

Bunnix smiled sheepishly, “Anyways, he’s here to help you! You can tell him anything! I have to go make sure your Nathaniel didn’t escape! Good luck you two!” 

With another open portal and a wave goodbye, she was gone.

Marinette turned to Nathaniel, “I’m so sorry, it’s all my fault-”

“No, no!” He interrupted, “Don’t apologize! I totally would’ve done the same thing as you! It’s all good.”

She bit her lip nervously, “Still, I-”

Nathaniel placed a finger on her lips, “My Marinette has a habit of this too. Not everything is your fault. Don’t treat it like it is. Sometimes, things are just out of your control and you can’t change that.” He retracted his hand.

She looked surprised, like it had been the first time someone had ever said that to her and _how fucked up was this universe?_

Marinette smiled, “I think we should reintroduce ourselves then. Hey, I’m Marinette Dupain-Cheng, an aspiring designer and Ladybug, heroine of Paris.” She held out her hand.

Nathaniel took it in a handshake, “I’m Nathaniel Kurtzberg, aspiring illustrator, and a time travelling assistant to Bunnix.”

After the handshake was released, Tikki came flying out of her bag, “Hi, I’m-”

“Tikki, I know,” Nathaniel smiled, “Nice to meet you.”

Marinette looked around, “This probably isn’t the best place to talk about the entire situation. And we can’t go to the bakery since my parents will get mad at me.”

“Oh, let’s go to my place!”

“What about your parents?”

  
  
“They’re divorced and I live with my dad,” He shrugged, “But he’s also neglectful as hell so he only comes home once every two to three months.”

Marinette gasped, “That sounds terrible!”

“It is what it is. I’m used to it though.” He gestured to Marinette’s locker, “Get your stuff and let’s head out.”

\---

“WHY WOULD YOU UNTIE HIM?!” Bunnix screeched at Marc in the burrow.

“It is _unethical_ to keep tying up the people you kidnap!” He argued back.

“Unethical,” Bunnix huffed, “I don’t wanna hear that from the guy who insists on the internet that the akumas should be killed in akuma attacks so the battles can end quicker.”

Marc gasped, “Hey, they don’t even keep their memories so it’s not like it would be traumatic!”

Nathaniel sat there awkwardly on the ground. 

What...was he supposed to say in light of this?

It was clearly obvious that Marc wasn’t all he seemed to be. Maybe Lila was wrong about him?

Thinking back on it, Marc was really never possessive. He just wanted to hang out, which is what normal friends did.

But then why did Lila say that? It was such a far stretch to think. And she wouldn’t lie, right?

...

“Holy shit,” Nathaniel whispered to himself as he got a reality check.

\---

Nathaniel opened the door to his apartment, “Welcome to my humble abode.”

Marinette looked around, “It’s… really big so I don’t think you can call it humble.”

“Benefits of having a rich parent, I suppose,” He sat down on the couch, “So let’s talk. What has Lila been doing to you?”

She sat down near him, “Um...She’s been saying that I’ve been tripping her in the hallways, stealing her stuff, cyberbullying her, and harassing her when we’re alone.”

  
  
“What has the class been doing?”

“Whatever they do, it’s not their fault, they’ve all been tricked by Lila!” Marinette said in defense before answering the question.

“Marinette, they may be tricked, but they are still accountable for their actions,” Nathaniel retorted, “Were you just going to let them get away with tearing apart your sketchbook?”

Her silence spoke volumes. She deflated slowly into her seat.

Okay, this was an incredibly toxic mindset and he needed to get Marinette out of it _now_.

“Hey, Marinette, I’ve seen that look in your eyes before.”

She perked up, confused.

“The look that says that they’re right and that you shouldn’t be here,” Nathaniel continued, “I know it because it used to be in my eyes too.”

“Now, I never personally went through this, but I’m guessing you’re thinking that since they’re just being tricked, everything that happens is on you, right? Your fault for not trying hard enough to save them.” He breathed deeply, “But it’s not. It’s not at all. You tried your best. And now? If they crash and burn, it’s their fault. Not yours.”

Nathaniel looked her in the eyes, “The world still wants you here Marinette. Our classmates don’t reflect the entire world.”

Marinette looked down at her lap, before shaking. She looked up at Nathaniel, tears spilling down her cheeks. “Thank you,” She whispered.

“No problem,” He gave a soft smile back. Marinette wiped her tears away.

“I-I shouldn’t be crying-”

“It’s okay to cry, you know.”

“Hawkmoth-”

“Only goes after people who think there’s no way out,” Nathaniel tilted his head, “Weren’t you the one who proved that phrase?”

Her only answer was lunging forwards and hugging him, crying into his shoulder.

They stayed there for a while, simply enjoying each other’s company.

\----------------------------------

Here's a quick scribble of Kelpie Sinnamon did over a doll base.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pls enjoy my chapter my neck is killing me - UN


	4. Tomatoes, Bugs and Salt, oh my!

“Ugh, now I feel like crap.” Marinette said, wiping her face with the towel Nathaniel had gotten for her. She had cried herself out and was now calming down. 

“Nothing a good nap won't fix. I hope.” Nathaniel shrugged, not really sure what to say. Marinette laughed slightly.

“Naps are the best. I miss naps.” 

“Not much time to do that when Hawkmoth could strike at any moment.” Tikki sighed with her. Nathaniel grunted in agreement, thinking back to some of the times Bunnix had decided a time issue simply couldn’t wait until morning and dragged him (literally) out of bed.

“So um, time assistant. What’s that like? What do you do?” Marinette asked.

“This, pretty much. Bunnix identifies a problem in a timeline, and sends me in to try and fix it before the timeline has a ‘bad end’”. He said, making air quotes with his hands. “She can’t come in herself because she needs to monitor the timeline for changes. If she went herself, and did something that would lead to the bad end, she wouldn’t know until it happened or she went back to the burrow, so she needs to use a proxy.” 

“So you’re here because something is wrong with this timeline?” Marinette asked, pulling her feet up under her to sit more comfortably.

“Something is _seriously_ wrong with this timeline. What happened today? The way I’ve seen everyone acting? Marinette, normal, good, _sane_ people do not act like that. How long has everyone been like that? There’s got to be some kind of external factor making them act like that.” Nathaniel said, running a hand over his face.

“Our class isn’t like that in your universe? Hanging on Lila’s every word like it’s gospel?” 

“Everyone was real excited about the tales she told at first, but we all saw through them pretty quick when she kept making promises she couldn’t deliver on, and mixing up her facts. Especially since nearly everything she said was easy to verify or disprove since so many of us actually know the celebrities she only claims to. Most of the class just humors her now. She came up with some BS about having a ‘lying disease’ and shot herself metaphorically in the foot. Almost no one believes what she says anymore. Most people just feel sorry for her. I think the school forced her into mandatory therapy with the school counselor.” Shrugged Nathaniel. 

“Wow, you actually got people to fact check her lies?” Marinette said, looking impressed.

“Not me, my version of Marinette did. The class listened to her since we’ve all known her for years, and Lila only a couple months. I really need to stress that what your class did is NOT normal, and you shouldn’t be defending them.” Stressed Nathaniel. 

“Your universe sounds nice.” Marinette sighed wistfully. 

“Yeah, but we’re here to fix your universe. So, back on track. Everyone started acting like this when Lila showed up?” Marinette started to nod, then hesitated. 

“They got really bad when she showed up, but honestly none of us have ever been close. We were acquaintances at best before this year. I’ve never been that popular, I don’t get invited to things or asked to hang out. It’s part of the reason I was so excited to meet Alya at the start of the year. Finally, a friend! Or so I thought.” Marinette slumped in her seat. 

“You’re a good friend, and a good person Marinette! It’s not your fault they can’t see that.” Tikki chimed in, hugging Marinette’s hand. Marinette smiled and hugged her back.

“Thanks Tikki. I’d be lost without you.” Nathaniel paused, not wanting to interrupt the moment, but there was still work to be done.

“What about Chat Noir? How is your partnership with him? I saw the end of the akuma attack this morning. Is he always that...sexually harassing?” He asked.

“Ugh! Is he ever! Lately I might as well be fighting by myself since he’s too busy trying to hit on me. I just don’t know how to get through to him that I don’t like him like that, and he’s being a nuisance.” Marinette exclaimed, throwing up her hands.

“We’ve talked about asking for his miraculous back, but Marinette doesn’t know his identity and I’m not allowed to tell her.” Tikki said, giving Nathaniel a significant look.

“...I can tell you who he is, if you want. You should be sure you want to replace him before I do though. The Ladybug and Black Cat do need each other, or else things become unbalanced. Do you have the Miraculous box in this universe, or is Master Fu still around?” Nathaniel questioned.

“I...have the box.” Marinette sighed, thinking back to Miracle Queen. They had almost lost everything that day because Chat was more interested in flirting than fighting. “And...I really think it’s time for Chat to hang up his miraculous. Every battle we win by the skin of our teeth, and people get _hurt_ because he’d rather play around than do his job.”

“Right. Ok. Do you have a replacement in mind?” Marinette shook her head.

“Maybe my cousin? Marc? He’s the only one I feel like I can still trust.” 

“I’ve seen Marc wield the black cat before. He could be an option.” Nathaniel mused.

“Would Marc be a good black cat for _you_ though, Marinette? The two of you need to be balanced in all things. Does he feel right to you as a black cat?” Tikki gently asked.

“No, you’re right.” Marinette said, shaking her head. “I think the two of us would egg each other on too much. Marc doesn’t look like it but he loves chaos. I need someone more...stable.” She said, waving her hands.

“Well what about Luka? Do you know him in this universe?” Said Nathaniel, thinking of the older boy’s calm demeanor. Marinette’s shoulders stiffened. 

“Luka threatened me to stay away from him and his sister in no uncertain terms when Juleka and Rose told him about all the ‘awful’ things I had done to Lila. I tried to talk to him, but why would he take the word of a girl he’s only known for a few weeks over his sister?” She said wryly.

“That’s...a really good point.” Nathaniel admitted. “Too bad Luka has brain parasites too in this universe. I think Tikki is right, you need your black cat to be someone calm and level headed. Some from _your_ universe.” He stressed when he noticed Marinette’s contemplating look.

“Oh no, I know you wouldn’t be a good cat. No offense, but even if you were staying forever you don’t really strike me as the “calm” type.” Marinette laughed softly. “But WILL you be staying for a while? I could use a partner while I look for Chat’s replacement.”

“I’m here for as long as it takes to get this universe back on track.” Nathaniel shrugged. “I’ve spent months in a timeline before.”

“Months?! How old are you?” Marinette asked in shock. 

“Eh, it’s hard to say. Each timeline has its own, well, timeline so just because I age in one, I would go back to the age I was last time I was in a timeline when I went to another one. If that makes sense.” Nathaniel scratched his head. “I do gotta say it’s annoying when I’m gone long enough to hit my growth spurt, and then when I go home I’m short again.” He grumped.

“Anyway,” he said, waving a hand to clear the air. “You want Chat’s Miraculous back. You’re sure?” Marinette and Tikki both nodded firmly. 

“Well then you should know that Chat Noir is Adrien Agreste.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one by Sin. Sin is tired. Sin would like a nap.


	5. Cats are Masters of Salt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ladybug and Nathaniel go to confront Chat Noir. It doesn't go as planned.

“Adrien?” Marinette whispered. 

After a quiet moment of consideration, she sighed, “I can see it. He never stood up against Lila once during this whole thing and he always seemed to be a huge Ladynoir shipper.”

Nathaniel fidgeted with his hands, “How are we going to get the miraculous?”

“I was thinking I’ll go ask him tonight during patrol.”

He raised an eyebrow, “Do you really think that’s gonna work?”

Her shoulders slumping down was her answer.

“Alright then. Let’s come up with a plan.”

\---

Chat Noir landed on a rooftop. It was covered in dead leaves that wind had carried and left there. He stared at Ladybug, who was standing in front of the door leading into the actual building. She had invited him here after patrol so they could talk. He had a feeling he knew what it was about!

“Hey, m’lady, are you here to confess your undying love to me?”

Ladybug stiffened, “No. It’s not that.” She straightened her back, “Chat Noir, as the guardian of the miraculous, I hereby request you return your ring.”

Chat’s stomach dropped. 

“Haha, funny joke, bugaboo.”

She didn’t drop the serious look on her face, “I’m not joking. Chat Noir, your ring.” Ladybug held out her hand.

“Why?” He snarled, “I haven’t done anything wrong!”

She stared at him with an unamused look, “You keep sexually harassing me during battles, when we should be focused on protecting the city. Chat, you prioritize your feelings over the fighting!”

“It wouldn’t happen if you just agreed to date me!”

“I don’t want to date you!” Ladybug shouted back, “And I will not hesitate to come over there and take your ring myself!”

She...She couldn’t do that! Chat Noir was his only freedom from home!

Ladybug had no right to!

“No,” The word left his mouth without his consent.

Ladybug frowned, as if expecting this.

“You can’t!” He screamed, “You will not take it from me!” 

Ladybug started walking towards him, “Chat, I don’t want to fight you. Just hand it over.”

He hissed, using his baton to launch himself over her, landing in her previous position. She turned back, surprised.

“You’ll never take it from me!”

Ladybug bit her lip, “Now!”

He turned around to see a boy with a bee themed costume lunging at him. Chat dodged, making the boy drop into a roll, stopping near Ladybug and standing up.

\---

_Ladybug grabbed a miraculous out of the box. She turned to him, “Nathaniel Kurtzberg, this is the bee miraculous. It grants you the power of-”_

_“You don’t have to give me the entire speech,” Nathaniel interrupted, with a grin, “Time traveler, remember?”_

_“Oh,” She laughed quietly, “Right.”_

_He placed the comb in his hair, transforming with the phrase, and turned to Ladybug._

_Ladybug smiled, “You know the plan?”_

_“Let you try and talk him into giving you the ring. If that doesn’t work, I sting him with Venom and stop him from moving.”_

_“Yep!”_

_“Alright. Let’s do this.”_

\---

“If you just wanted me to be jealous, this isn’t the right way to do it, m’lady,” Chat’s eyes left the new hero and focused on Ladybug.

“J-Jealous?”

“This was really convoluted,” Chat continued, leaning on his baton. “You didn’t have to get another hero to play hard to get.” He winked at the girl. She scrunched up her face, clearly uncomfortable.

“And who’re you?” Chat turned to the boy.

“Honey Trap,” He answered, shrugging. “Now, are you going to hand us that ring?”

“Still on about that?” The blonde drawled, “The joke stopped being funny a while ago.”

The other boy’s only response was to dive for Chat’s ring again. Chat jumped up, without using his baton this time. He didn’t need it! This was an amateur! It wasn’t like he could _possibly_ best someone who’s been at this for months!

Chat landed, turning back around with a growl, “That the best you can do?”

Honey Trap held up a baton in his hand, “I mean, I think it was pretty good, considering you don’t have your baton now.”

Chat quickly looked down at his side. How did he grab his baton so quickly? Honey Trap had no experience on the battlefield!

He heard the familiar sound of Ladybug swinging her yo-yo behind him.

“Chat Noir, please just give up your ring so we don’t have to harm you.”

He started walking towards the other boy standing on the rooftop, leaves crunching underneath his boots.

Honey Trap relaxed slightly, expecting him to give up the ring.

That gave Chat Noir his opportunity.

“CATACLYSM!” He lunged at the bee hero, causing him to drop the baton and jump backwards. The motion made Honey Trap slip on some of the leaves and fall, looking up at Chat Noir.

Chat caught the baton in his uncharged hand, smiling maniacally, “Not so good now, huh?”

“Chat, what’re you doing?” Ladybug screamed, sounding panicked.

He turned back to his love, “It’s his fault, isn’t it? He’s the one who made you think we weren’t destined to be together. Don’t worry. Once he’s gone, we can go back to being the perfect pair.”

“Oh my fucking god, he’s insane,” Honey Trap muttered, bewildered. 

Chat tilted his head, looking directly in Honey Trap’s eyes, “You won’t be here for much longer. I’ll make sure me and my lady are together forever.” 

The bee hero looked around for a moment before scooping some leaves off the ground and throwing it at Chat’s hand. Once the leaves made contact with it, it crumbled to dust, rendering the destructive power inactive.

Chat made a startled noise. He glanced around at the other two before jumping off the roof, using his baton to get back home.

Ladybug helped Honey Trap up, “I didn’t think he’d try to...murder you.”

“Yeah, I didn’t expect that either,” He murmured, dusting himself off.

They stared off into the distance.

“I guess we have to do the spy movie way then.”

\---

  
  


Plagg wasn’t very happy with how Adrien was turning out. After detransforming, he had gone into a rant explaining what had happened on the roof.

He was absolutely petrified as Adrien described his plan to kill, _kill_ , the new hero.

All for a crush? They wouldn’t even be allowed to know who each other were until Hawkmoth was defeated!

Adding onto this, Adrien didn’t see anything wrong with how he was treating Marinette at school! It’s like he just expected her to suck it up! At least that redhead kid wised up and started helping her.

Once he could leave, Plagg was going back to Marinette, the rightful guardian.

\---

Ladybug stood on the roof over Adrien’s room, tying a yo-yo around Nathaniel’s waist, “Are you sure about this?”

Nathaniel nodded, “It’s the middle of the night. No one will see. Gabriel barely checks his cameras anyways.”

Ladybug let out a shaky breath. She had gone through way too much in one night. “Ready?”

The boy hummed in a confirmation. Ladybug slowly reeled out the yo-yo like a fishing line as Nathaniel traveled down the wall. He soon reached Adrien’s window. 

It was pushed open easily. Nathaniel knew that he always kept it unlocked so as to get to akuma battles quicker whilst in his room.

He swung his body, using the momentum to get his feet on the other side of the glass. Nathaniel moved down into the room, landing quietly on the floor. Looking over, Adrien was fast asleep in his bed.

“Plagg?” He whispered.

Plagg flew out from under a pillow, surprised.

“Grab the ring, we’re here to get you out,” Nathaniel continued, pointing at the yo-yo at his waist, “I’ll explain later.”

The kwami looked at his owner, looking sad he couldn’t help him. He flew over, pulling the ring gently off Adrien’s finger. Plagg flew over to Nathaniel.

The redhead opened his jacket, gesturing to an inside pocket Plagg could go inside of. 

Plagg flew inside it, settling himself inside.

Nathaniel tugged on the yo-yo, giving Ladybug the signal to pull him up. As he was pulled up, he closed the window behind him. 

When his feet touched the roof again, he gently took Plagg out of his pocket, giving him and the ring to Ladybug.

Plagg looked up at Ladybug, “I’m sorry.”

She smiled, “It wasn’t your fault.”

Nathaniel looked over at the city, “Let’s get going before we get caught.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I gotta stop writing everything in one interval, my neck is starting to hurt - UN


	6. Ex-Boyfriend with Ex-tra Salt.

The next day, Nathaniel faced his biggest problem in this universe yet: his alternate self was apparently two sizes smaller than him and none of ‘his’ clothes fit. After tearing apart ‘his’ entire closet (while Pollen helpfully buzzed and giggled about his situation) he finally found a pair of sweatpants that were stretchy enough to fit and a T-shirt that didn’t ride up _too_ badly. He hoped his jacket would suffice to keep him from looking like he suddenly gained forty pounds over night.

“Jesus christ dude, eat a cheese burger sometime…” He grumbled, fully aware that other him was probably being forced to watch all this in Bunnix’s Burrow. Hopefully Bunnix would be useful for once and there would be some of his own clothes waiting for him when he got back from school (and whatever else popped up) today. He preferred wearing baggy clothes, they hid his figure which was just a little too fit from all his adventures than an introverted artist’s should be.

Putting some cookies in a ziplock bag in his pocket for Pollen, he placed the Bee miraculous in the breast pocket of his jacket (it was much too noticeable, even in camo mode, to be wearing) and grabbed his school bag. The walk to school didn’t take long, and he caught up with Marinette right outside.

“ Morning.” He greeted. She looked tired. He hoped she was getting enough sleep. 

“Good Morning, Nathaniel.” She greeted, then paused. “Did your clothes shrink?” She asked, looking confused.

“Ah well that’s…” He leaned in to whisper, mindful of the other students about. “Seems like the me in this timeline is a bit...skinnier.” He blushed. Marinette’s eyebrows rose in understanding, a teasing grin breaking out on her face.

“Oh?” She chuckled, playfully poking him in the stomach. 

“Marinette!” He whined.

“MARINETTE!” Someone else shouted. Nathaniel jerked his head up to see who it was, just in time for his face to erupt in pain with an echoing “CRACK!” that made him nearly lose his balance. 

“Marc!” He heard Marinette cry out. Well that made sense, Nathaniel vaguely thought to himself. Marc had a surprisingly good left hook.

“Marc- _oomph!”_ He coughed, when Marc’s next swing caught him in the abdomen. What the hell had his other self _done?_ He mentally whined.

“Marc _stop!_ ” Marinette said, holding the other boy back.

“You stay away from her!” Marc hissed at Nathaniel, who was trying to get his wind back. “I don’t know what your game is, but I’m not going to let it happen!” 

“Marc please, what’s gotten into you?” Marinette pleaded, bodily standing between the two boys.

“You haven’t heard? No, you just got here and you don’t really have any social media…” Marc muttered to himself. Nathaniel’s ears perked up, following the other boy’s gaze to the groups of students who were all staring their way, whispering. 

“Why do I get the feeling I’m _really_ not going to like what you have to say next?” Nathaniel hissed, still holding his stomach where he had been socked. 

“Nathaniel! Nathaniel Kurtzberg!” Aurore called out, eagerly elbowing her way through the crowd. She had her cell phone out and seemed to be recording. 

“...Yes?” He asked, feeling nervous at her shark-like grin.

“What do you have to say about the rumors that Marinette is sleeping with you to get you to do her bidding?” What.

“What.” He deadpanned.

“What?!” Marinette shouted.

“Fuck.” Marc growled to himself, shying away from the crazy weather girl.

“I mean, by now the entire school has heard about how you attacked your classmates yesterday when they tried to confront Marinette about her bullying, and then dragged her away never to be seen again until this morning! Together! Possibly wearing her clothes!” Aurore continued in glee, gesturing to his too small clothes. 

“That is _not_ -” Nathaniel tried, but Aurore continued over him.

“And right in front of your Ex, Marinette’s cousin!” She crowed, pointing her phone at Marc, who had his hood up and was looking away stubbornly. “Unless you’re having both of them now?” Aurore grinned. 

“We are NOT-!” Nathaniel tried again, but the warning bell ringing cut him off. 

“What a scandal!” Aurore crowed. “More on this at lunch!” She said into her phone camera, before running off to get to class. Everyone else followed suit until just Marc, Marinette, and Nathaniel were standing there.

“What the actual fuck is wrong with everyone here?” Nathaniel wondered out loud. He noticed Marc giving him a suspicious look, but Marinette interjected before the other boy could say anything.

“Let’s just go to class. I have enough tardies as it is.” And so they went.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Class was...tense to say the least. No one was able to say anything to them during class, but both Marinette and Nathaniel could feel their malicious stares. Adrien had slunk in ten minutes late in an _awful_ mood. Nathaniel hoped that come lunch, Adrien’s drama would draw attention away from him and Marinette. He suspected with a sinking feeling that wasn’t going to happen. Not with the contemplating looks Lila kept giving him out of the corner of her eye all morning. The lunch bell rang. Ms. Bustier left, and Nathaniel braced himself for the coming storm.

“Marinette!” Lila called sweetly, ignoring Nathaniel completely and hopping down the stairs. Oh boy, he thought, here we go.

“I feel just _terrible_ about what happened yesterday!” The maybe Italian girl started. “If that had really been your design book...well that could have ruined your whole career, to lose that much work!” Nathaniel had to hand it to Lila, she was a great actor. If he didn’t know better, he would say she was sincere in her distress.

“I know you and I don’t see to eye to eye, but I was hoping to extend an olive branch. You see, I know MDC and I can get you in to talk to him about your designs-” Marinette’s mouth dropped open as Lila continued talking. She looked like she couldn’t believe what she was hearing, and not in a good way. Nathaniel thought back, MDC? Wasn’t that the name Marinette sometimes published under...Oh. Ooooooh. Oh boy.

“You, would introduce _me_ to MDC?” Marinette said flatly. 

“Of course!” Lila beamed. 

“Me. To MDC?”

“I’m sure he’s love to see your designs Marinette!”

“You would introduce ME to MDC?!” Marinette growled. 

“Y-yes? You don’t sound happy about this?” Lila looked confused. Marinette clasped both hands in front of her like she was praying. Probably for patience. 

“What’s the matter with you, Marinette? Don’t tell me you’re going to pass up this opportunity just because Lila is the one to give it to you?” Alya interjected. “You love MDC. When you still had an Instagram you reposted their designs all the time.” Chloe burst out laughing from where she was still in her seat, and Alya glared at her instead.

“What’s so funny?”

“How incredibly brain dead you are, Cesaire. Don’t mind me, I’m just enjoying finally seeing goody two shoes Marinette finally see what the _real_ world is like.” Chloe laughed meanly, cluing Nathaniel into two things. First, she knew Lila was lying. Second, she didn’t care because she was still a huge bitch in this universe and as long as Marinette was the target and not her, she didn’t care.

“Nathaniel?” Marinette called, gritting her teeth.

“Yeah?” He asked, snapping out of his thoughts.

“Would you come with me please?” She said, smiling through clenched teeth.

“S-sure?” He said, grabbing his bag. He didn’t trust this class not to mess with it if he let it out of his sight. 

“And where are you two going all buddy buddy?” Alix asked, giving them the stink eye. 

“According to the gossip mill, I’m going to find the nearest empty closet and shag him wildly.” Marinette deadpanned, dragging him out of the room.

Nathaniel only squeaked in alarm as he was pulled along.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Marc met them on the way to Marinette’s house. 

“Ok, what is going on here?” He asked, arms folded and nose wrinkled in that absolutely adorable way it did when he got stubborn about something. Nathaniel’s heart did a little flop. So cute, but also capable of murdering him, which was surprisingly hot.

“What do you mean? Just hanging out with Nathaniel!” Marinette laughed awkwardly. How she had kept her identity secret so long when she was so terrible at lying in any universe baffled Nathaniel. Natural Ladybug luck? Had to be.

“Right. Which also explains how he grew biceps overnight.” Marc said flatly, not buying the BS. “And don’t try to tell me you’re wearing her clothes. Marinette doesn’t even _own_ sweatpants, and the shirt you’re wearing is _mine_ that you never gave back. Asshole.” Oh shit. Nathaniel hated it when they were observant. It made his work so much harder.

“Ah well you see that’s because, I mean, we’ve been talking about-” Marinette scrambled, trying to find an excuse.

“Switching schools!” Nathaniel exclaimed. Marc looked at him like he grew another head. “Yeah! Um, I’ve been trying to convince her to switch schools because all the people at this one are terrible and toxic, and she’d do better somewhere else!” 

“Switch schools?” Marinette asked, baffled. 

“While that is...actually a good idea, that doesn’t explain why you suddenly look like _this_.” Marc said, gesturing to Nathaniel. “Is he akumatized again somehow?” 

“What? No! Don’t be silly. He’s not even purple.” Marinette said, waving a hand as if to clear the air of the silly notion. Nathaniel shrugged as if to say ‘yeah man, I’m not even purple’. Marc just narrowed his eyes and waited. Both Nathaniel and Marinette began to fidget under the judgemental stare. 

Why did Marc have to be one of the smart ones?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Call me Salt Oprah. You get some salt! You get some salt! Everybody gets some salt!


	7. Confess Your Salt

“I want an explanation,” Marc crossed his arms, glaring at Nathaniel. Which like, from what he’s heard about this universe’s Nathaniel was fair.

“Okay,” Nathaniel agreed, “But, let’s talk somewhere else?”

Marinette opened the door to the bakery, gesturing inside, “Come in.”

They quickly moved in past her parents, who didn’t question anything.

They all settled in on her couch.

“Alright, now spill,” Marc confronted, “And I want the truth.”

_ Well, if he wanted the truth... _

“Well, okay if you insist,” Nathaniel started speaking in a sarcastic tone, “I’m actually a time traveler sent from another universe to save this one, and I’ve replaced your Nathaniel because he needs a reality check.”

Marc blinked while Marinette shot him a panicked glance.

Nathaniel snorted, “Kidding. Why would you ever think that’s true?”

The truth was stranger than fiction most of the time, after all.

“I just figured out she was lying,” He continued, “Um, I do owe you an apology. I shouldn’t have dropped you for the next shiny thing that came along.”

And hopefully by the time his alternative self came out of the burrow, he’d have the same mindset.

“You shouldn’t be apologizing,” Marc said, after a moment.

Both Marinette and Nathaniel looked at him confused.

“After all,” Marc looked up with a glint in his eyes, “You were telling the truth, Mr. time traveler.”

Nathaniel forced himself to laugh, “You think I was telling the truth?”

The brunette crossed his arms, “I dated Nathaniel for months. I know the tells for when he’s lying. You displayed none of them during that.”

_ Shit. _

Nathaniel groaned, leaning backwards, “Why couldn’t you have been one of the dumb ones too?”

Marinette smiled at Marc, “I think that’s a compliment.”

He simply blushed and looked down, “So...Why do you need to save this timeline?”

“Marinette is in danger of being akumatized,” Nathaniel explained, “...Or worse.”

Marc hummed, “Makes sense.”

Marinette gawked, “What? I’m just a normal girl!”

“Yeah, but even this time traveler agrees if you get akumatized, it would be the end of the world. You’re literally an angel.”

Marinette huffed, “You guys exaggerate.”

“But do we?” Nathaniel asked.

Nathaniel turned to Marc, continuing the serious conversation, “Lila has apparently brainwashed all the people here, or all of them are really that stupid, to start treating Marinette like a witch, and they’re the mob. If this continues on, nothing good will happen. So that’s why I’m here. Once my job is done, I’m probably heading back to my dimension.”

“Well, I mean,” The brunette leaned forwards on his arm, “I wouldn’t mind if you stayed. You already seem a lot better than our Nathaniel.”

He laughed, “I’m flattered, but-”

A white portal opened up behind Nathaniel, showing a man wearing a skull on his head. The man hissed.

“KELPIE, HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I SAID TO NOT BREAK THE WALLS OF MY BURROW TO INTERRUPT TIMELINES?!” A female voice cried out. Kelpie turned to where it came from, flipping her off.

“Um, let me tell him to back off my boyfriend?”

He dodged backwards, out of view, as an umbrella went hurtling towards him. Bunnix leaped across the view of the window, screeching, presumably chasing after Kelpie.

Another person walked into the view and Nathaniel was met face to face with himself.

“U-Um, hi?” He said, “I’ve been watching, and have also gotten the reality check I needed. Marc, Marinette, I’m really sorry for everything I did.”

Marc pouted, “You better.”

“When I get back, I’ll make it up to you guys. I promise.”

Marinette smiled, “At least, you’re apologizing with actual remorse for your actions. That’s all I needed.”

Bunnix came back into frame, shoving the other Nathaniel out of the way, “Nathaniel, get your goddamn mission over and done with. Your boyfriend is too much to deal with by myself for extended periods of time.”

There was an offended gasp from somewhere they couldn’t see. Then the portal closed.

“So, uh,” Nathaniel turned to Marc, “Can you see why I can’t stay here?”

“Yeah.”

“You’re dating a superhero?” Marinette asked.

“Um, he’s not...technically a hero? Kelpie doesn’t fight crime. He only took the miraculous cause he saw me going into the burrow once and wanted to get me out. Bunnix took the miraculous from a universe that didn’t need it and gave it to him full-time.”

“You’re dating a vigilante,” Marc deadpanned.

“Well, I mean I do have a type,” Nathaniel shrugged.

“Type?”

“For people who can beat the shit out of me.”

Both Marinette and Marc coughed in surprise at that statement.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am,,,, not proud of this at all - UN


	8. Salty Interlude

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is pure, cracky humor. There is no plot advancement here, only insanity.

Meanwhile, in Bunnix’s burrow…

“STOP BREAKING TIME AND SPACE _IN MY BURROW_ YOU STORE BRAND KNOCK OFF!” Bunnix screeched as she attempted to strangle Kelpie with his own hair. 

“Stop kid- _cough_ kidnapping my man and I wont- _HACK_ HAVE TO!” Kelpie choked out while trying to stab Bunnix with his weapon; a horse shoe that split apart into two knives. They had been going at it for a while now and Nathaniel didn’t know whether to be impressed or terrified. A bit of both, really. This entire thing felt like some weird fever dream. Talk about going down the rabbit hole. At least things couldn’t get any weirder. 

“My bride~” Someone purred into his ear, a pair of strong arms wrapping around his waist from behind. Nathaniel screamed and tried to break away from the touch, but it was like fighting steel bars. Air tickled his neck as the person behind him audibly inhaled, then sighed in disappointment and dropped him. 

“Oh. Just another fake.” Nathaniel scrambled away like a crab, taking his assailant into view. He looked almost exactly like Chat Noir, except completely white. It also looked like his ears and tail were real instead of accessories. Said appendages were drooping cutely, the strange off color Chat Noir seemingly sad that Nathaniel wasn’t...the other him, he guessed. 

“S-s-sorry?” He squeaked out as the not-Noir contemplated him. Seemingly coming to a decision, the cat man effortlessly scooped up the red head like he weighed nothing and carried him to the couch pointed towards Nathaniel’s apparently fucked up timeline. Settling the slighter boy in his lap and hugging him like a teddy bear, the strange cat man posed a question.

“So what’s wrong with your timeline?” 

“Um?” Nathaniel asked intelligently. 

“Your timeline. The place crazy and crazier kidnapped you from.” Shrugged the cat, gesturing to the two fighting in the background. 

“It’s uh, I guess people are mean in it? I’m not really sure- Are they always like that? Who are you?” Nathaniel blurted out in a rush, trying fruitlessly to squirm away from the strange man. 

“I’m Blanc. I’m a god.” Said the cat man, sniffing at Nathaniel’s hair again. “And yes, they’re always like that. The rabbit usually drives the user crazy at some point, and the mental stress of wielding two Miraculous at once for long periods of time can do the same.” Blanc explained, sounding bored. “You’re not already mated are you?” 

“Hey, hey! Paws off the hostage!” Kelpie growled, only noticing Blanc because Bunnix had pinned him over the back of the couch.

“Hello Blanc, come to mope again about missing your Nathaniel?” Bunnix asked more cordially, prying Kelpie’s mask off. The mask flashed into a pair of sunglasses as Kelpie became Marc again, a tiny horse appeared on one side while a small snake looking creature popped into being on the other. 

“He’s ten now in my universe. That’s _almost_ sixteen, right? What does it matter if I can see him a few years early or not?” Blanc whined miserably. Bunnix made a sympathetic noise while Marc groaned miserably from where he was draped over the back of the couch. 

“Blanc’s Nathaniel got reincarnated and the gods of his universe have banned Blanc from contacting him until he’s at least sixteen years old. They want the kid to grow up normal before his divine husband starts harassing him again.” Bunnix said, hopping onto the couch as well, like that explained everything. “How’s your son by the way?” She asked Blanc politely. 

“Uh…?” Nathaniel wondered. He was ignored.

“Causing trouble, naturally.” Blanc said, perking up a bit. He looked proud. 

“I think I’m going to puke.” Marc groaned again, the two little animal things patting his head consolingly. 

“Well don’t do it on my couch!” Bunnix snapped. Blanc scooted to the far edge of the couch, Nathaniel still on his lap. Marc made a retching noise and Bunnix screeched, leaping up to drag him away from the sitting area by the back of his shirt. Blanc didn’t seem phased, instead turning his attention to the time window into what Bunnix had been calling the “salt” universe.

“Is this one your universe? Looks boring.” Nathaniel had given up on trying to get away, the apparently god was so strong the redhead doubted he even noticed Nathaniel struggling. Instead he tried to focus on the going ons of the time portal, and not the clawed hand gently stroking his side.

The other him was sitting in class again, looking bored. Time seemed to pass differently on the other side of the portal than in the burrow, so while it had been less than an hour since the Marc in his timeline had discovered he had been switched with a time traveler inside the burrow, in his actual timeline it looked like school was almost over for the day. 

“I guess it is?” Nathaniel was still feeling bewildered by this entire thing. Chat Noir was apparently a god in another universe and completely white? Some other universe Nathaniel was married to him? There was a son? He felt like someone had slipped him acid or something and this entire thing was one bad drug induced trip and he was going to wake up in the hospital any time now. 

“Oooo, drama!” Blanc exclaimed, leaning forward slightly. Glancing at the time portal again, school seemed to be over and Marinette was arguing with the class about that designer she liked. MDC? Nathaniel thought they were called. He didn’t understand why Marinette was so opposed to a chance to meet them- No, bad. He scolded himself. Marinette was opposed because Lila was likely lying about knowing the designer and setting up a trap. 

“That weird fox looking bitch is _obviously_ lying. Is that the problem with your universe? That everyone is stupid?” Blanc asked. Nathaniel hunched down in shame.

“Yeah, it kinda is.” He admitted. Blanc apparently picked up on that. 

“Were you one of the dumb ones?” Nathaniel hid his face in his hands and nodded. “That’s ok. My Nath took _forever_ to realize I was a better mate for him than that stupid pirate captain. Or that surprisingly opportunistic green eyed kid Dad is so fond of.” Blanc snorted, gesturing at the screen where Marc was standing behind time assistant Nathaniel and giving his backside a contemplating look. 

“I’m going to smother him in his sleep if he does more than look.” Marc grumbled, plopping back down on the couch. Bunnix sank down beside him with a frustrated sigh. 

“You’re the one cleaning out the puke bucket.” She grouched.

“The puke bucket wouldn’t even be necessary if you would stop ripping me out of a unified transformation like that-!” Marc shot back. The two began to bicker back and forth while Blanc buried his head in Nathaniel’s hair again and inhaled like an addict finding free crack. Time assistant him was fending off a rabid Aurore who was trying to interview him for her gossip site. He personally just wondered how much longer it would be before he was as crazy from all this as Bunnix and Kelpie.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note: Blanc is from another universe and is not Adrien in any way, shape, or form. He doesn't have a miraculous and just happens to look like Chat Blanc through universal coincidence. He comes from an AU on that discord we keep mentioning, but in one of the NSFW tabs so beware if you go there looking for a fun story because in between all that is a lot of dicks.


	9. Salt In The Wound

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adrien has some complaints to give to Marinette. Also he starts to fuck up this timeline even more.

“So are the rumors true? Is Marinette letting you sleep with her?” Aurore asked Nathaniel.

He was about to seriously punch someone in the face.

“No, they’re not true. Leave me alone,” Nathaniel answered, walking away.

“Pff, that’s bullshit! There’s no reason you just believe Lila’s a liar out of nowhere!”

He sighed, “I’m going to go jump off the roof now. Bye.”

The shock of that statement allowed him to escape the reporter’s questioning.

Nathaniel quickly escaped into the locker room where Marinette was waiting. 

“Ready to go?” She asked.

“Let me get my stuff first, then we can go.” 

Adrien walked up to Marinette while Nathaniel got his stuff out.

“Marinette, you should really stop arguing with the class. And you’ve been denying their requests for clothes! Stop being such a bully and help your class!”

She rolled her eyes, not responding.

His voice went into a whisper, “When Lila gets exposed, aren’t you scared of her getting akumatized?”

“Adrien,” She snapped, “That is on her, not on me. It is not my responsibility to make sure nobody gets hurt. I am supposed to take care of my own mental health. If that means I don’t bend over backwards for every request, so be it.”

He stopped in surprise. Nathaniel walked up, “Hey, I’m done. Let’s go.”

Adrien watched them walk away, “Wait, Marinette!”

The girl turned back.

“Do you think Chat Noir was a good hero?”

The locker room went quiet. Multiple people started giving their compliments to the hero.

“I don’t think so,” Marinette stated after a while. 

“What?!” Adrien shouted.

“He gets distracted during akuma attacks a lot,” Marinette explained, "And he flirts with Ladybug when he should be focusing on the battle."

“What do you mean was?” Nathaniel asked, with an innocent smile.

Adrien sputtered and left the room. Before he left, Marinette noticed he was still wearing a silver ring. Maybe because he felt weird not wearing a ring? Who knows.

“I don’t like where that’s going,” Nathaniel muttered to Marinette.

They were cut off by an akuma alert on their phones.

“Ah, shit.” The two quickly headed out to transform and battle the akuma.

\---

“Once the cat shows up, I’ll take your miraculous!” The akuma boasted from the middle of the courtyard.

Ladybug bit her lip, “About that..”

“Venom!” Honey Trap dropped down from the roof, jamming his top into the akuma.

Ladybug walked over to the frozen akuma, taking off a pin on their costume and breaking it.

She quickly purified the akuma while Alya ran over to Honey Trap. 

“Ooo, are you a new hero?”

He nodded, “Honey Trap, nice to meet you.”

Alya beamed, “Ladybug, where is Chat Noir? He usually shows up at the same time you do!”

Ladybug sighed, “Chat Noir has been retired.”

“W-WHAT?!” Alya ran up to Ladybug, surprised.

“He has been doing actions that are unsuitable for a hero,” She explained.

“He was sexually assaulting her,” Honey Trap called from behind Alya.

“That… is more blunt than what I would’ve said, but yes, that is essentially it.” 

Adrien scoffed from the side of the courtyard, “Sexually assaulting...It wouldn’t have happened if she just accepted her feelings.”

He didn’t notice the black butterfly going into the ring on his right hand.

_Catastrophe...I am Hawkmoth._

_You have been betrayed by Ladybug. You must get her miraculous and get her to tell you where yours is._

_I will give you a strengthened version of your past powers._

_Do we have a deal?_

“Yes, Hawkmoth.”

_Excellent._

Honey Trap glanced over to the transforming boy, “Uh, that’s not good.”

Ladybug and Alya looked over as well.

“A-Adrien?” Alya stuttered.

The transformation finished. A picture perfect copy of Chat Noir was standing there.

“Hello, m'lady.”

Quickly, the area around his feet began to turn pitch black before crumbling into dust. It only seemed to dip down into the Earth for a couple of inches before stopping.

“Oh, that is definitely not good,” Honey Trap whispered underneath his breath. He was cut off by a beep from his comb, “I have to go, but I’ll be back!” He quickly took off into the sky, presumably finding a place to detransform.

“Adrien? You were Chat Noir?” Alya asked, slowly backing up with her camera still filming.

“Were?” He murmured, “It _is_.”

As he took a step closer, the destruction around his feet spread. Adrien tapped a table on the way there. It also disintegrated.

“Oh...shit,” Alya murmured into her camera, walking backwards, still recording.

Ladybug gulped.

Oh boy.

\---

Chloe had stopped watching the recording a while ago. She had thrown her phone at the wall when she had seen the new bee hero.

“A new one?” She snarled, “Why?! I was the best one!”

Chloe took the comb she had custom ordered off her head. She stared at the almost exact copy of the bee miraculous.

“She shouldn’t have replaced me!”

Chloe didn’t do anything to stop the black butterfly from entering the comb.

_You are right, Queen Wasp._

_You shouldn’t have been replaced. Work together with Catastrophe, and you can get your miraculous back._

_Shall we proceed?_

“Of course, Hawkmoth. I’ll show them the true queen.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OoOOoO t w o akumas!!!  
> My chapters are getting shorter than earlier in the fic :///  
> \- UN


	10. Salting the Earth

Nathaniel fed Pollen and transformed in record time. Racing back to where Ladybug was holding down the front lines, he silently cursed the various students peeking out of classroom doors instead of evacuating like sane people. Though he wasn’t sure why he was expecting anyone in this universe to have any common sense at this point. Ladybug was on defense, avoiding Catastrophe’s lunges and grabs by a wide berth. Her yoyo was nowhere in sight. Thinking fast, Honey Trap grabbed a bench (thank you Miraculous enhanced strength!) and tossed it at Catastrophe, hoping to at least knock him off balance. It vaporized into a cloud of dust about a foot from the Akuma without touching him.

“Well that isn’t good.” He said, landing at Ladybug’s side.

“You’re telling me.” She hissed back. “He destroyed my Yoyo almost as soon as you left. I need to detransform to get it back, but I can barely keep out of his reach!” She told him as they both dodged the Akuma’s furious grabs.

“YOU!” Catastrophe roared at Honey Trap. “This is all YOUR fault! You brainwashed her some how! Everything was great until you showed up!” The akuma switched his focus to the bee hero with murderous intent. 

“Chat! Adrien! Please! This isn’t Honey Trap’s fault! It was my decision to take your miraculous!” Ladybug pleaded, trying to get him to see reason. 

“If that was true, why did you never mention wanting my ring back until the night HE showed up?” Catastrophe growled. He had tried to chase Honey trap to the upper level but his destruction aura ate through the floor, sending him back to the ground. Now he was just systematically destroying supports in hopes of bringing the bee hero down to him.

“Because I didn’t know who you were before then! Chat please, stop! You’re going to bring the building down.” Catastrophe did stop. Honey Trap shivered at the look on his face.

“He knows who you are.” The akuma growled. 

“Adrien-”

“HE knows who you ARE!” Screamed Catastrophe. “I’ve been asking since the day we met and you tell HIM before he even gets a Miraculous?!”

“He already knew who we BOTH were!” Ladybug shot back. “He’s...like Master Fu. _He_ came to _me,_ not the other way around.” She bluffed. Honey Trap hoped she knew what she was doing.

“The decision to remove you was the Order’s.” Honey Trap said, playing along. A butterfly mask appeared over Catastrophe’s face as Hawkmoth communicated with him and...was that buzzing?

“Do you hear buzzing?” He asked Ladybug in a whisper.

“New plan.” Hawkmoth said through Catastrophe. “Capture the order lackey alive. I’d love to know what other secrets he knows.” The buzzing grew louder.

“Of course Hawkmoth. A quick death isn’t good enough for this imposter. I want him to _suffer_ for stealing my crown.” Ladybug and Honey Trap spun around to see Queen Wasp standing arrogantly behind them, said in unison:

“ _Fuck_.”

\---------------------------------------------------------------------

Ladybug and Honey Trap spent the next hour literally running for their lives. It was hard to find a hiding spot Catastrophe didn’t know about by virtue of having been Chat Noir. After a trip through the sewers (and it’s water to avoid Queen Wasp’s wasps) the two had stumbled into a part of Paris’s catacombs. Marinette had transformed for a breather, while Honey Trap stood guard.

“Since when can Hawkmoth throw out three akuma’s in a row like that?!” And complain.

“He IS an adult. He doesn’t have a limit on his powers.” Tikki pointed out. 

“It actually makes less sense to why he hasn’t done it sooner.” Marinette pointed out, slumped against the wall.

“I wish I could just tell you who he is so we could go beat the shit out of him.” Honey Trap groaned, sliding down the wall into a sitting position. 

“Wait, you know who HAWKMOTH is?” Marinette exclaimed.

“Yeah? So does Bunnix. The Burrow shows the entire timeline, and no I can’t tell you who he is without disrupting it.” He grumbled, running a hand through his hair which was now blonde and black striped. His natural hair color was a little too noticeable even with miraculous magic, so it made sense to him to change it in his hero form.

“You told me who Chat Noir was.”

“That was to fix the timeline slash prevent the bad end. Hawkmoth is a problem you need to defeat without outside help. I’m sorry.” Honey Trap sighed. 

“The rabbit is cursed with knowledge they can’t use.” Tikki input. “But right now we need to worry about Catastrophe and Queen Wasp.”

“...right.” Marinette hesitantly agreed. “I’ve defeated Wasp before, if you can sting her before she stings you we’ll be set. Catastrophe is the bigger problem. We can’t even get near him without risking poof!” She mimed a little explosion with her hands. 

“Your Lucky Charm should give us a clue.” Said Tikki. 

“I think we’ll need to deal with Chloe first, before I use my charm.” Marinette thought out loud to herself. “We can’t get to the miracle box for aid either, not even in our civilian forms.”

“Who would we even go to for help? Your said Miracle Queen happened here, so all of your heroes are known to Hawkmoth. Even if they weren’t, it doesn’t sound like you can trust them anymore with how they’ve been treating your civilian self.” Said Honey Trap. 

“I can still trust Marc, but he’s never had a miraculous before. Throwing him in the deep end with a foe like Catastrophe could do more harm than good.” Marinette groaned miserably. “Guess we’re on our own. Well, no time like the present. The longer we sit here, the longer the city is in danger.” She said, pulling herself together. Honey Trap dusted himself off as he stood. 

“You know, this might not be the time for this, but you’re one of the strongest people I know. In any universe, the ability to just get back up again after you’ve been repeatedly knocked down is amazing.” He said, helping her to her feet as well.

“Thanks.” Marinette laughed slightly. “I think.” Honey Trap shrugged and smiled back. 

“Now let’s take down those akuma. Spots on!”

\-----------------------------------------------------------------

“This isn’t working!” Honey Trap yelped as he furiously swung the hand held bug zapper they had “borrowed” from a store front, praying the batteries held out. They had planned to have him live up to his name and sweet talk Queen Wasp into a false sense of security by claiming to be a fan so he could get in close and Venom her. The akuma didn’t care. She just wanted him on the ground and suffering.

“We’re out of options. I guess it’s time for a Lucky Charm!” Ladybug called out, catching the charm while dodging Catastrophe. The two heroes tried to keep the battle mobile, but Catastrophe had already brought down several buildings, crushing victims paralyzed by Queen Wasp’s venom. The longer this fight went on, the more casualties piled up. 

“Give me my miraculous, imposter!” Queen Wasp hissed, sending wave after wave of her minions at the bee hero. 

“Plan?!” Honey Trap shouted, while Ladybug frantically looked around. An object lit up in the distance. 

“Follow me!” She said, making a break for it.

“You won't get away!” Catastrophe screamed in the most cliche way. Queen Wasp just lunged for Honey Trap, catching him by the ankle midair as he tried to flee. Ladybug moved on instinct, pushing off the building to kick the akuma away from her partner...directly into Catastrophe. Queen Wasp didn’t even have time to scream before she was vaporized, the butterfly following suit. Catastrophe looked just as stunned as the heroes did.

“No...I didn’t mean…!” Ladybug gasped in alarm.

“The cure will bring her back!” Honey Trap hissed, shaking her shoulder slightly. “Right now we need to get some distance!” When she didn’t respond, He picked her up bridal style and took off in the direction she had been heading. 

“I killed her. Oh god, I killed her…” Ladybug muttered to herself in a daze. Honey Trap landed at a power station and hid behind the small office shed. They didn’t have much time before Catastrophe came after them.

“Ladybug, she’ll be _fine”_ He promised, pushing down his panic to try and sound soothing. It wasn’t working and honestly he didn’t expect it to. Marinette was such a sweet girl, and she had just _killed_ someone. Even if it was by accident. Talk about traumatizing. Honey Trap stroked her hair and pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead. 

“Don’t worry, I’ve got this.” He promised her, gently easing the lucky charm out of her hands. It was a large magnet. He looked around the station, trying to come up with a plan. 

“Okay. I can do this, no problem right? What would Fortuno do…” He muttered to himself. Glancing at the active power lines, he got an idea.

“It can’t be that easy. Then again, this is magic…”

“Honey Trap! What have you done with My Lady!?” Catastrophe called out, effortlessly walking through the fence surrounding the tower like it wasn’t there. Which, after coming into contact with his destruction aura, it wasn’t.

“Oh shit, time’s up. Please be that easy!” Honey Trap shouted, throwing the magnet at the live wires and diving to protect Ladybug. The magnet hit the wires and began spitting sparks like crazy, the super charged magnet pulling in anything metal that was nearby. Including the ring Catastrophe was wearing. The akuma shrieked as he was pulled towards the wires, desperately trying to hold onto his ring. The laws of nature won in the end, ripping it from his hand and onto the magnet, which dropped to the ground. The entire exchange took less than ten seconds.

Honey Trap dove for the object as Catastrophe did the same. Honey Trap was just a hair faster, smashing the ring just moments before Adrien crashed into him, transformation dropped. Honey Trap shook with nerves from the close call. The butterfly akuma fluttered upwards, before getting zapped on the still sparking power lines. That was lucky. Speaking of…

“Ladybug, you need to cast the Cure.” He said, wobbling over to where she was sitting on the ground, hugging her knees and staring into space. “You’re going to detransform soon…”

“The cure…” She blinked at him. “Yes, the cure.” He handed her the Lucky Charm and she staggered to her feet. “Miraculous Ladybug!” She called, her magic Ladybugs swarming across the city.

“Ladybug?” Adrien asked, struggling to his own feet. “What happened? What did you do? She looks awful!” He accused.

“I will deal with you later.” Honey Trap growled, pointing a finger at him. “Ladybug, are you okay?” He asked more gently. 

“I need to see if Chloe is alright-!” Ladybug said, getting ready to jump off, but Honey Trap grabbed her arm. 

“She’s fine now. You know she is, but you need to rest. You’re about to transform back.” He said as her earrings beeped their next to last warning. “Go feed your kwami, I’ll deal with Adrien.”

“I...alright.” She said, knowing he was right. “But I will be right back, and I definitely have some things to say to you, Adrien.” She said, before leaping away. Honey Trap turned to the teen model, who had a stubborn look on his face. The bee hero sighed and ran a hand over his face.

“I need a drink.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fortuno is a reference to Ladybug Nathaniel, who Username8746489 is writing a fic about. Go check it out! It's also an AU on that discord we keep promoting. This entire fic is shaping up to be an ad for that lol


	11. Therapy With A Pinch of Salt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adrien gets some bootleg therapy from Honey Trap and Marinette is surprised although she really shouldn't be anymore.

“What did you do to Ladybug?!” Adrien yelled.

“I didn’t do anything,” Honey Trap said, “ _ You  _ did.”

“I’d never do anything to hurt m’lady!” 

“You think that, but you did.”

“Oh yeah?” Adrien crossed his arms, “Name one occasion.”

“You’ve been harassing her since you fell for her.”

“Well, she should have just accepted her feelings for me!”

Honey Trap, sighed, pinching the area between his eyes, “Adrien. Do you really think that she likes you back?”

“She has to! We’re soulmates!”

“First of all, since I’m from the order, I can confirm that’s a lie.” It wasn’t really. Adrien just grew unsuited for the Black Cat, so they weren’t soulmates anymore. “Do you think she still needs to love you?”

“Ladybug should! I’ve been there for her since day 1!”

“And if she doesn’t?”

“...There’s no reason why she shouldn’t.”

Honey Trap sat down in front of Adrien, who was still knelt down on the ground.

“Let me give you a scenario. She doesn’t love you. That’s it. No jokes, no playing hard to get, she just thinks of you as a friend. Now. What do you do?”

“Try to convince her to love me?”

“...Fuck, you’re really sheltered, aren’t you?” Honey Trap muttered, “Have you ever seen an actual relationship before going to public school?”

“I mean, I saw the stuff on TV!”

...Honestly, he should’ve expected that.

“There’s your issue. Relationships in shows and movies aren’t realistic. The girl isn’t going to fall for you every time.”

“But, we’re destined to be together!”

“No, you’re not.”

Honey Trap stood up, “Adrien, deep down, I know you can grow to be better than this. But the first step to growing is admitting you’re wrong. Do you really think it’s fair that Ladybug has to keep telling you to back off?”

Adrien stared at his hands, pondering.

“Do you still think you’re in the right?”

The blonde stood up and walked away without answering.

_ Damn… At least I tried. _

\---

Marinette ran up to the school. Chloe was huffing, looking in a compact mirror, fixing her hair.

“Oh thank God,” Marinette whispered under her breath, seeing the blonde.

Chloe sneered at the sight, “What do you want, Dupain-Cheng? I have more pressing matters to deal with, like that bee imposter and my  _ hair _ !”

“You...You died!”

“Inside!” Chloe whined, “I woke up in the middle of the street with my hair and clothes ruined!”

“You...disintegrated...right in front of me,” Marinette murmured, not thinking about what she was saying.

Alya huffed, crossing her arms, from besides the blonde, “My phone didn’t keep the footage from the fight since it got disintegrated.”

“Do...Do you not care?!”

“Oh shut up Marinette, you’re being over dramatic as always,” Alya brushed her off.

Marinette opened and closed her mouth a couple times before Nathaniel walked up to her, placing a hand on her shoulder.

“Hey, remember everyone here are idiots. Don’t bother.”

Alya gasped, offended, “Excuse me?!” 

Nathaniel ignored her, guiding Marinette towards the bakery.

“She’s...okay…”

“Yeah,” Nathaniel brought her into a one armed hug, “She’s fine.”

Marinette shook a little, “Yeah...Yeah.”

She took a deep breath, “Let’s figure out how to expose the lying witch.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short Chapter sorry yall - UN


	12. Butterflies love salt

Adrien’s father was waiting for him at the top of the foyer stairs when he got home. Adrien had called his bodyguard from the powerstation, not wanting to go back to school. He never knew becoming an akuma left you so tired afterwards. That and despite viciously denying everything Honey Trap had said, Adrien could not stop thinking about it. _Had_ he been in the wrong? Sure, Ladybug had continuously turned him down and even seemed aggravated by his affections, but Father had always said that ‘no’ just meant ‘try again’, in both business and life.

“Adrien.” Gabriel greeted solemnly, breaking the boy out of his thoughts. Nathalie was standing beside him with an unusually serious look on her face. Even for her.

“Come with me.” The Agreste patriarch commanded, walking into his study. Adrien followed. What else could he do? Without the cat miraculous he was just plain Adrien Agreste again. He held no power to resist whatever punishment his father was planning, for whatever crime he had committed. Gabriel had that stormy look about him that definitely said Adrien was about to be punished. The boy wondered if he would get to know why this time.

“It seems we have both been keeping secrets from one another lately. Secrets that perhaps we both felt were best to keep, but I can see now that secrecy only leads to unnecessary heartbreak and conflict.” Adrien gave him a puzzled look, but did not comment. He had not been given permission to speak, and he wasn’t willing to test the waters right now. Gabriel accepted his silence with a satisfied nod and turned to the painting of Emilie. He pressed several spots, which sunk into the portrait with low _clicks,_ revealing a hidden elevator. 

“Come.” Gabriel said simply, stepping inside. Eyes wide, Adrien did as he was told. What in the world…? 

“I know you were Chat Noir.” His Father said suddenly as they descended. 

“What?! No, that’s ridiculous- I mean-” Adrien sputtered, breaking his silence.

“Do _not_ lie to me!” Gabriel said sharply as the elevator came to a halt. The doors opened into a large cavern filled with plants, white butterflies lazily fluttering to and fro. Adrien felt a chill run down his spine. This was getting creepier by the minute. Without a word, Gabriel strode down the narrow walkway to some sort of altar that lay at the end. ‘This is it’ Adrien thought ‘My father is part of some bizarre cult and I’m about to be sacrificed’. Gabriel touched the side of the altar, and the top of it slid back to reveal…

“ _Mother?_ ” Adrien gasped, feeling like all of the air had been sucked from his lungs.

“The peacock miraculous did this to her. She was a hero, like you, but her miraculous was damaged. So now here she lies in eternal slumber.” Gabriel monologued, not seeming to notice Adrien’s distress at all. “I fixed her miraculous with the information we managed to retrieve from the Guardian, but still she slumbers. I have exhausted _every_ means available to me, both magical and ordinary and still, she slumbers!” He thundered, fists clenched. “There is only _one_ solution left to me to bring her back: Combining the miraculous of the ladybug and cat. You _will_ help me.”

“Help you? How?” Adrien questioned, eyes glued to his mother’s still form. Gabriel smirked. 

“The peacock _was_ damaged, but no more. Unfortunately Nathalie has already sustained too much damage to continue to be Mayura. I need a new partner.” He said, extending the peacock brooch. Adrien connected the dots. 

“ _Hawkmoth_.” He whispered in horror. Gabriel Agreste smirked wider, hand still extended. 

“Take this miraculous, join me, and we can both have whatever we desire. Emilie will return to me, and Ladybug will be yours if you so wish. She won’t have a choice.” No choice? No, that was wrong. Adrien might have been bullheaded and persistent in his pursuit of Ladybug, but he had always wanted her to _choose_ him. Otherwise how could he be sure their love was real, if he just forced her to do what he wanted?

“No.” Adrien said, backing away from the insane man.

“No?” Gabriel echoed, expression turning stormy. “Norro, dark wings rise!” he thundered, becoming Hawkmoth. Adrien tripped as he tried to scramble away from the dark figure, every interaction he had ever had with Ladybug playing at light speed through his mind. Everytime he had harassed her, or ignored what she was trying to tell him. 

“Try again.” Hawkmoth growled.

Adrien was very, very sorry.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Nathaniel sat on Marinette’s fainting couch in her room, only allowed up there by her parents because Marc was there too. He guessed they figured there would be no shenanigans if one of the boys in Marinette’s room was her cousin. From the not so subtle way Marc kept finding excuses to squeeze his arms, or otherwise touch him, Nathaniel wasn’t so sure. He was relieved when Marinette returned with some drinks, because the green eyed boy sitting next to him was _definitely_ thirsty. 

“So you really think it’s a good idea to reveal myself as MDC?” Marinette asked, sitting at her desk.

“It would be irrefutable proof Lila is lying.” Nathaniel shrugged, pointedly ignoring how Marc had scooted close enough that their thighs were touching.

“I’m just worried they will try to destroy my brand by attacking my website with comments about what a ‘bad’ person I am.” She said, making air quotes. 

“That’s what they did to all her personal social media accounts.” Marc input. “That’s why she deleted them all. Her MDC account is the only one still up because it wasn’t linked to any of her personal ones.”

“My agent suggested that I stay anonymous since I’m still a minor. We were planning on doing a reveal on my eighteenth birthday next year.” Marinette said.

“You’re seventeen?” Nathaniel blinked in surprise. “My Marinette is only sixteen...what year is it here?” he questioned. 

“You’re a time traveler and didn’t think to check what year it was?” Marc snorted, not even trying to hide that he was laughing at him. Marinette was more kind and told him the date.

“Huh. That’s the same date as in my timeline. I guess everyone was just born a year earlier here? I guess that’s part of what makes this an alternate reality instead of just timeline.” Nathaniel mused to himself, then wrinkled his nose as a thought hit him. 

“Wait, if the me in this universe is a whole year older than I should be in _my_ timeline, why the hell is he so damn short and skinny still? Is no one feeding this boy?” Nathaniel gave an irritated tug at his pants. “He really needs some more protein in his diet.”

“I am more than happy to supply both him _and_ you with as much protein as you like.” Marc purred at him, placing a hand on his knee. Nathaniel abruptly stood up and walked over to stand near Marinette.

“And someone needs to get _you_ some gatorade because holy shit you are _dehydrated_.” He scolded. Marc had the humility to be embarrassed by his actions. 

“Sorry, I’m coming on a little strong arn’t I?” He said sheepishly.

“Just a little.” Marinette said, pinching her thumb and forefinger together. Marc grabbed one of the pillows on the couch and hid his face in it. 

“I’m sorry!” He said, muffled. “Just because you’re the hotter, older looking version of my maybe-no-longer-ex-boyfriend doesn’t mean I should be hitting on you like that.”

“I _am_ older, technically. My age is complicated due to the time travel, but that’s not the point. The point is I have a boyfriend who will very much rip a hole in space and time just because he’s jealous. As the technically adult here I should have told you to cool it sooner.” Nathaniel explained, rubbing the back of his head. He felt bad that Marc embarrassed himself. 

“I’ll try to be less... _thirsty_ , but my god, you look like you could top and I’ve been craving that.” Marc gave a frustrated sigh, chewing on the edge of the pillow. 

“RIGHT, OK. I don’t think I need to hear any more of this!” Marinette interjected, frantically waving her hands between them. “Going public with my designs! Plans?”

“...Right.” Said Nathaniel, crossing his arms. Best to move on before he disappointed this Marc by telling him he was more of a bottom. Sure, he could go switch if he wanted, but there was just something about a man that could break his back that- oh, bad thoughts. Stay on topic.

“Do you know Jagged Stone in this universe?” Marinette nodded. “He’s unashamedly one of your biggest fans in mine, maybe you could get his backing for your reveal. At the very least invite him to a fashion show for your brand and get some pictures with him backstage to prove your identity. Kind of a ‘Hey meet my designer!’ thing. The images would get more traction on his social media than yours. This way no one could claim you photoshopped it.” Nathaniel suggested, leaning a hip against the desk. He noticed a ladybug shaped box and made a note to talk to Marinette later about hiding it somewhere better.

“That might work. I know he’s in town, I’m actually working on a commission for him right now, I could invite him to the fashion show at the end of this month when I give him his commission.” Marinette said thoughtfully. 

“That’s a little more than two weeks away. Your class has been escalating. Are you sure this can wait that long?” Marc said, hugging the pillow to his chest and stretching out on the couch since Nathaniel had opted to stand.

“I am...concerned about that.” Nathaniel admitted. For more reason than one, not that they could tell Marc about the Ladybug stuff. “Maybe in the meantime we could focus on getting your parents to let you switch schools?

“At this point, I’d be glad to go. I don’t think there’s anyone left in school I care about keeping in contact with anymore.” Marinette sighed.

“We’ll have to get my other self transferred too. I honestly don’t trust that pit of vipers not to make him their next target. Same with you.” He said to Marc.

“That’s all well and good, but where would we go?” Marc asked. At that moment, Marinette’s phone began to ring. The caller ID came up Kagami Tsurugi. 


	13. Salty phone conference

Marinette answered the phone call.

“Hey, Kagami, what’s up?”

“I’ve heard some rumors from Adrien. I was wondering if you could clear them up for me?”

“Put it on speaker,” Marc whispered.

Marinette obliged with the command, “What rumors are you talking about?”

“Mainly the one about you bullying Lila?”

Nathaniel gagged exaggeratedly. 

“Which I don’t understand, because you’re an angel on Earth.”

Marinette blushed, “I’m really not.”

Marc and Nathaniel stared at her.

“Anyways, they’re false. Lila doesn’t like that I keep trying to expose her lies so she made up a rumor I’m bullying her.”

“...Do people at your school not realize she’s a liar?”

“You know?” Marinette asked.

“Yes, it’s really obvious.”

“You say that, then you see our class bullying Marinette as retribution,” Nathaniel groaned.

“Ah. I didn’t realize I was on speaker.”

“Sorry!”

“...Why are you apologizing, Marinette?”

After a short pause, Marinette answered, “I don’t know.”

“You said your class was bullying you?” Kagami asked.

“They tried tearing up her sketchbook, and they’ve tripped her in the halls several times now.” Marc explained.

Kagami clicked her tongue, “That’s absolutely atrocious.” 

“Right?” Nathaniel said, “Anyways, we’re planning to move schools so that Marinette can be in a healthier school environment.”

“Still trying to find a school though,” Marinette sighed.

“Why not come to my school?” 

The three teens perked up.

“Why your school specifically?” Marinette asked.

“She wants to get closer to you,” Marc guessed.

“While that may be a part of it, it’s not the full reason,” Kagami explained while Marinette threw a pillow at Marc.

“My school is heavily focused on the arts, with a relaxed schedule. It costs some money but I imagine you would be able to pay for it with all your commissions. I’m not sure if the other two would be able to pay for it though.”

“We have money from the comic,” Marc thought out loud, “We could probably pay using that money.”

“What happens if the class comes to the bakery looking for you though?” Nathaniel asked.

“Oh, that’s easily solved,” Kagami said, “My school has dorms. If you choose, you can stay here.”

“Well, that’s convenient,” Nathaniel muttered.

Marinette mulled over it, “It sounds like a good idea. Now we just have to get my parents to agree to it.”

She sighed, “That’s gonna be hard. They’ve been getting on my case lately a lot for being tardy to school.”

Nathaniel bit his lip, knowing the reason why. It wasn’t like they could remedy that situation considering she can’t exactly give up being Ladybug.

Marc hummed, “Maybe I can try to get my sister to reason with them?”

“I don’t think they’d let me unless there’s a good reason for me to leave our current school.”

“Being intensely bullied isn’t enough of a reason?” Kagami asked.

“They think I’m lying,” She explained, “Especially since all our classmates that come into the bakery tell them about how wonderful Lila is. I don’t know what they think I’m jealous over, but they think I’m jealous over something Lila has.”

God, Marinette really doesn’t have a support system in this universe, huh?

“Maybe if I come back you up, they’ll let you go?” Marc asked.

“They probably won’t believe you without proof,” Marinette pouted.

“Ugh, jeez,” Nathaniel huffed, “This is much more complicated than it needs to be.”

“I apologize, but I need to go,” Kagami said. The three said their farewells before she hung up.

Marinette shoved her phone in her pocket, “You think we can rope Kagami onto the ‘Convince my parents to let me transfer’ scheme?”

“She would probably go for it if we’re being honest,” Nathaniel responded.

“With the MDC reveal, Lila will be exposed,” Marc pondered, “Since she’ll be revealed as a liar, that’s probably the best time since your parents will see you’re telling the truth.”

“I don’t want to wait till the end of the month though,” Marinette said, “Lila will probably double down on the bullying since Nath’s on my side now.”

“There isn’t really anything else we can do though.” Nathaniel muttered.

She sighed, “I know. I just wish we could transfer without all this trouble. Guess we can’t though.”

Marc pet Marinette on her head, “Hey, it’ll only get better from here.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Forcing myself to make longer chapters??? That's been me this entire fic!!! - UN


	14. Thank you for our daily Salt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So each "later" day is counting using the last chapter as reference. So it's "X days after last chapter" not "X days later, and the X days after that". This chapter covers a little over two weeks. Lots of salt!

Marinette asked her parents about switching schools.

They said they would think about it.

So now all there was to do was wait and try to gather enough evidence that her current school situation was non-viable to convince them.

\-------------------------------------------

Two days later, they learned that Adrien’s father had pulled him out of school permanently on the grounds that a public education was interfering with his ‘career’.

\-------------------------------------------

Three days later, Nathaniel came back from lunch to find his locker vandalized. The door was beaten and bent, and the word ‘TRAITOR’ was written across the front in spray paint. Marinette’s locker received a similar treatment, except hers said ‘WHORE’.

Nathaniel worked out a plan with Marc so she was never alone between classes, for any reason.

\--------------------------------------------

Five days later, Nathaniel was sitting in the principal’s office for ‘fighting’ with Kim, who had started the encounter by grabbing him by the hair and trying to sock him in the stomach. The larger boy had gotten quite a shock when Nathaniel gave better than he got, the clear winner of the scuffle before the teachers had pulled them apart.

They both got detention.

Kim got akumatized.

\------------------------------------------

Six days later, Alya was excitedly crowing about the up close footage she had gotten of Honey Trap while Chloe steamed in the corner. Lila claimed that Ladybug had told her that she had replaced Chat Noir with Honey Trap because the new bee was also her new beau.

Nathaniel sighed and ate the lunch Kelpie had given him this morning, placing the note signed with a heart in his pocket.

\------------------------------------------

Seven days later, Jagged Stone called Marinette and confirmed he had found time in his schedule to attend her fashion show. He put out a public tweet saying he would be there, and how excited he was for the world to finally meet his favorite designer. 

The post exploded with comments and was all the fashion conscious half of the school would talk about. Marinette coordinated with her agent while Marc and Nathaniel helped her write her reveal speech and practice potential interview questions.

Lila boasted about how she would be backstage during the show, helping MDC with last minute touches to ‘his’ line.

\----------------------------------------

Eight days later, the trio decided to take a break from plotting and have a nice day out. Marinette, Nathaniel, and Marc had lunch at a quiet outdoor cafe, and took a walk along the Seine. They laughed and commented on various plants and public sculptures they saw, sharing ideas and inspiration, until they ran into a group from their class.

The girls were having a day out too it seemed, minus Chloe and Sabrina, and instead of minding their own business, decided to harass the protagonists. The two groups argued loudly, the larger not letting the smaller escape, until Juleka made to shove Marinette into the river but hit Marc instead. Having heard the commotion from their house boat, Anarka and Luka arrived just in time to witness this. 

Anarka read the girls the riot act over their protests of ‘Marinette started it!’ while Nathaniel helped Luka fish Marc out of the river. The boy was fine, just soaking wet and extremely pissed off. Marinette, Marc, and Nathaniel made their escape while Anarka scolded the girls, and Luka looked on thoughtfully.

\------------------------------------------

Nine days later, school was back in session and the girls had apparently told all the boys how they had been ‘assaulted’ yesterday. The hair on the back of Nathaniel’s neck was on end the entire morning with the feeling of ‘oh shit something is coming’. When lunch came he bolted out of his seat and practically carried Marinette out of the room. They met Marc along the way, who they dragged with them in a power walk towards Marinette’s house. They didn’t make it.

Just outside the bakery, the boys from the class caught up with them. Ivan grabbed Marc by the backpack and lifted him, kicking and swearing, off his feet to toss him into the side of the building. Nathaniel retaliated, but got tag teamed by Kim and Nino. Max stood between Marinette and the other boys, keeping her from interfering. Nathaniel braced himself for a long fight, when suddenly a new player entered the fray. 

Juste Chastel was a huge, mean, bully of a boy in Nathaniel’s home universe and Marc was his favorite target. In this one it seemed, he was still huge and kind of a jerk, but not willing to sit back and watch his classmate get beaten. With Juste to even the numbers, the others hesitated, and then fled when Tom burst out of the bakery. 

Marinette had another talk with her parents about switching schools.

\------------------------------------------------

Eleven days later, the class was in a standoff. With Juste keeping an eye on Marc, and Aurore gleefully keeping her camera pointed in their direction to catch any drama, Marinette and Nathaniel got a small bit of breathing room.

\-----------------------------------------------

Thirteen days later, there was another akuma attack during school. Ladybug and Honey Trap arrived on the scene, only to be blindsided by a large Sentimonster. The battle took nearly two hours, and by the time they returned to school the day was over. Nathaniel and Marinette were seen by Ms. Bustier and escorted to the principal’s office to wait for their parents. Shockingly, Nathaniel’s father actually showed up. He had apparently gotten back into town that morning from his business trip and was not pleased to be at this meeting. Marinette’s parents grilled the principal up and down about the treatment they had witnessed the other day, and the things Marinette had told them.

Nathaniel’s father just dragged him home, slapped him across the face when he tried to ‘talk back’, and hissed that he wished Nathaniel had died with his mother and sister in that car crash six years ago before locking him in his room.

Bunnix let Kelpie, who was currently just Marc, into his room to comfort him.

\---------------------------------------------

Fourteen days later, and two days before the fashion show, Nathaniel revealed what he had learned about the alternate him’s home life to Marc and Marinette. They started making plans to get his alternate self emancipated (after consulting said alternate self for his opinion on that) prior to switching to the new school. They looked into the legal process and discovered that the Nathaniel from this universe would be eighteen anyway before the process could complete. 

Time Assistant Nathaniel expressed concerns at how he would meet the tuition price for the new school, as it was a private school, but Salt Nathaniel just shrugged and told them how he had a secret place in his room he kept all his commission and allowance money in. He had been saving up money for years with the plan of getting as far away from his father as possible when he hit eighteen. He had more than enough saved up to cover his tuition and living expenses at this point.

Salt Marc expressed willingness to let Time Assistant Nathaniel crash on his couch if necessary, and in his bed if needed, until Kelpie threatened to scalp him. Time Assistant Nathaniel dryly reminded Salt Marc that his sister would never allow that. 

Salt Marc dramatically fell back on Marinette’s couch and bemoaned that no one would let him have nice things.

\--------------------------------------------------

The night of the fashion show arrived. Nathaniel was unable to attend due to his father still being in town, but Marc sent him live updates from the front row seat Marinette had gotten him. After the show ended, he would be going backstage with his sister and Marinette’s parents to collect her. 

After a long line of fabulous models all wearing fabulous MDC originals, Marinette came out with her agent and gave the small speech they had prepared, and answered a few questions from the reporters that were there.

Trending before the night was over was a selfie of Jagged Stone and Marinette on Jagged’s Twitter page.

“Meet my designer, the lovely Marinette!” 


	15. You can't put Salt back in the bottle

The beginning of school was...eventful to say the least.

Multiple people went up to Marinette, asking for an autograph. 

A selective few asked why Lila said she was male and why she was bullying her if they were best friends.

Marinette had to explain the lies to them, which they believed since Jagged had posted that picture.

It all came to a climax in the locker room.

“Marinette!” Alya cheered, “Since you’re not hiding anymore, you and Lila can be best friends in public!”

“...What?”

“It’s okay!” Rose commented, “We know you were lying about Lila being mean so it was easier to move away from your MDC persona! But since you’re out, you don’t need to anymore! We can all be friends again!”

“I wasn’t lying,” Marinette stressed. Lila smiled innocently, opening her mouth to speak.

Nathaniel quickly intercepted the attempt, “Marinette’s telling the truth. If she was lying, why would she keep doing it? Lila’s just been using her to increase her own popularity.”

The liar’s smile immediately dropped, her face scrunching up as she prepared her crocodile tears, “I-I’m sorry. I just wanted to make friends  _ and  _ I have a lying disorder! I didn’t mean for the lies to go on as long as they did! I can’t even control when I lie!”

The class immediately jumped to her defense.

“Aw, it’s okay Lila!”

“You’ll be fine with our accepting class!”

“Marinette will understand!”

“I am right here,” The girl in question muttered.

Lila sniffled, “But she already knew! I lied about a lot of things because of my disorder, but Marinette bullying me was not one of them!”

The class gasped at the audacity Marinette had to have to do that.

“Marinette, not cool dude.”

“How could you bully poor innocent Lila like that?!”

“She was just trying to make friends!”

Aurore had already pulled out her phone, recording the screaming session since the beginning. Marc was shooting worried glances at Marinette and Nathaniel. 

“She threatened me in the bathroom!” Marinette cried out in indignation.

Lila let out a strangled gasp, “What are you talking about? You threatened  _ me  _ if I didn’t stop stealing your spotlight.”

_ Her story went from them being best friends when the topic was still about MDC to Marinette bullying her... _

“Marinette! How could you?”

“Disgusting…”

“I thought you were a good person.”

“I’ll teach you to bully people!” Kim snarled, throwing a fist at Marinette’s stomach. Nathaniel reacted first, quickly stepping in front of her, taking the hit. He grunted before glaring at Kim.

“You trying to get beat up again? I’m sure I don’t need to remind you who won last time.”

Kim growled. Nathaniel didn’t notice Alya sneaking up behind him with her book bag. She brought it down hard on his head. 

After the initial shock of being hit, he grabbed her wrist and threw her over his shoulder. Nino quickly dropped down to check on her, scowling at him.

While Nathaniel was distracted, Ivan came around and shoved him down onto the ground. Kim quickly started kicking the fallen boy, some of the other members of the class joining. 

Alya led the rest of the class towards Marinette, shoving her down and starting to pull at her pigtails.

Marc rushed into the locker room, Mrs. Mendeleiev on his tail, “Stop them! They’ll seriously hurt Marinette and Nathaniel!”

With her help, they successfully got the class off the two.

Nathaniel, Marinette, and Lila were sent to the principal’s office to deal with it.

\---

Lila cried her eyes out, “And then she wouldn’t admit to the threat so my wonderful friends tried to give her retribution but they went too far!”

Marinette and Nathaniel sat quietly by Tom and Sabine, holding an ice pack to their bruises.

Mr. Damocles turned to them, “Well, I’m sorry, but you two won’t be returning. You’ll be expelled-”

“What?!” Nathaniel cried out, “We got attacked and  _ we’re  _ the ones being punished?!”

“Well, you heard her, Marinette-”

“You didn’t even let me talk!” Marinette refuted, “You just believe whatever Lila says? What if she’s the one that’s lying?”

“And furthermore, where is Lila’s mom?” Nathaniel continued, “If Marinette’s parents are here, then she should be here too!"

“Well, my mom is busy-”

“So are they!” Nathaniel gestured to Tom and Sabine, “They’re losing money the more time they spend here! If they have to deal with it, so does your mom!”

“It’s probably because her mom’s an ambassador,” Marinette muttered, “He’s scared of pissing her off and possibly giving the school a bad rep. That’s what happened with Chloe.”

“And probably why my dad isn’t here either,” He rolled his eyes.

“They do raise a good point,” Sabine said, “If we’re here, Lila’s mom should be here as well. Or at least on call.”

Lila waved her hand, “It’s really no issue.” Mr. Damocles nodded in agreement.

“Wow, it would really be a shame if MDC shamed this school online for not following procedure,” Nathaniel glanced at Marinette, the two of them smirking.

Mr. Damocles paled, “I-I’ll get right on calling her!” Lila paled as he dialed the phone and waited.

Everyone in the room slowly turned to the Italian with a ringtone blaring loudly from her pocket.

“Lila, why is your mom’s phone in your pocket?” Marinette asked, batting her eyes innocently.

Lila scowled at the girl as Mr. Damocles raised an eyebrow.

There was a knock on the door, saving Lila from her predicament.

“We’re busy!” The principal called.

“I have evidence for the fight that happened this morning,” A muffled voice replied.

Mr. Damocles looked pointedly at Marinette, expecting her to stand up and open the door. She sighed and did the action.

Marc stood there with Aurore. She held up her phone, “I have video and audio footage of what happened.”

She handed her phone over to the principal, who played the footage for everyone in the room.

“My daughter is attacked, and you intended to  _ expel  _ her for it?” Tom asked, after the video was finished.

“Lila said she threatened her in the bathroom!”

Nathaniel coughed, “Doesn’t Lila have a lying disorder? She even admits it in the video.”

Mr. Damocles looked, contemplating the statement.

“You were going to expel a student over a statement from a student who is  _ known  _ to have a lying disorder?” Aurore asked, smiling brightly, excited to get information for her gossip.

Mr. Damocles sweated nervously, “Well, I-”

Tom stood up, “Oh, you were right when you said my daughter won’t be returning to this school! She’ll be leaving on my own accord, because it’s horrendous how you almost expelled her for nothing!”

Sabine stood up as well, “We’ll be telling our friends about this. One of those friends being Nadja Chamack.” 

Mr. Damocles paled. Nathaniel pulled some papers out of his book bag, “Along with that, I’d also like to be removed from this school. I’d rather not be bullied for protecting my friend.” Behind him, Marc also brought out his dis-enrollment forms.

In a matter of seconds, Mr. Damocles had lost three students. Three students that were incredibly famous, with Marinette being MDC and Nathaniel and Marc running a popular comic. That meant rumors would be spreading about his school.

“N-Now, let’s not make any hasty decisions!”

“We’ve been planning this for about a month, so I doubt it’s hasty,” Marc smiled, handing his forms over, along with Nathaniel.

The group stood up and walked out.

“Now...Lila, may you provide me your phone so I can get your mom’s number?”

\---

Sabine cradled her daughter’s face in her hands, “Marinette, darling, I’m so sorry we didn’t believe you. We should’ve listened.”

Marinette hid her face in her mom’s shoulder, hugging her, happy that her parents believed her now.

“Do you know which school you want to go to now?” Tom asked.

Nathaniel pulled out his phone, browser already set to the school web[age, “We were planning on going to this one.”

“Oh, it looks good, but it’s a boarding school?”

Marc rubbed the back of his neck, “Since Marinette and Nathaniel got attacked outside the bakery a couple days ago, a boarding school would ensure that doesn’t happen again.”

“...It’s for the best,” Sabine sighed, “Promise you’ll call?”

Marinette smiled, “I promise Mama.”

Things were starting to look up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow that's a lot longer than I usually make my chapters - UN


	16. Should have remembered the Salt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's another short one, but things are heating up! -Sin

“Maybe I should reconsider Marc as my Chatnoir.” Marinette sighed. It was a week after they had left the school, and while they waited to hear back from Kagami’s private school about their enrollment, Nathaniel and Marinette devoted their time to brainstorming who should be the new black cat.

“That’s the easy option, but is it the  _ right _ option?” Nathaniel asked, laying on his back on his couch. They were at his house today, his father having left a few days earlier without so much as a goodbye. Nathaniel expected the other him would be well settled into his new school and dorm before the man returned. Hell, it was debatable if his father would even notice he was gone. That being said, it was so much easier to meet at his house than Marinette’s. Her parents were the kind that liked to ‘check up’ on them without warning to make sure they weren’t having sex. Because god knows that’s immediately what all males and females immediately get down to when left alone too long. Nathaniel rolled his eyes at the thought.

“No, no it isn’t.” Marinette groaned. “Kagami?” She asked, then immediately shook her head. “She might be level headed, but I don’t really know her that well.”

“You didn’t know Chat Noir either. Neither did Fu for that matter.” And his selection method was stupid as hell, Nathaniel thought to himself.

“I don’t know, she just doesn’t... _ feel _ right you know?” She sighed, running a hand over her face.

“You’re worrying about it too much, Marinette.” Tiki soothed from her plate of cookies. Pollen was also there, happily nibbling away and getting absolutely covered in crumbs.

“With the Miraculous, there  _ is _ an element of fate involved. As long as the Ladybug is active, the Black Cat WILL find its way to the person best suited for it sooner or later. Making a hasty decision might land you with another Adrien situation.” And no one wanted that, Pollen left unsaid.

“Speaking of Adrien, do you think we should, you know...check up on him? He’s had long enough to sulk I think.” Nathaniel asked, sitting up. 

“I’ve tried calling him a few times, but it always goes straight to voicemail.” Admitted Marinette. “I wanted to give him some space, but it would be good to make sure he’s alright. He might have been a horrible partner near the end, but he was my friend first. I’m worried about him.” Just then, the city Akuma Alert went off on their phones.

“Looks like Adrien is going to have to wait. Can I just say how much less stressful it is to not have to make an excuse to go hide and transform?” Marinette said, checking the app for location details about the akuma’s last sighting. 

“That’s what you need to be looking for in a partner, someone you can trust with your identity and you feel comfortable around.” Nathaniel encouraged, helping Pollen brush the cookie crumbs off. The bee kwami was definitely going to need a bath tonight. 

“Looks like the akuma is only a few blocks from here.” Marinette said without commenting on the input. “You ready?” Nathaniel nodded.

“Pollen, Buzz On!”

“Tiki, Spots On!”

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Ladybug and Associate! So glad I found you!” The akuma gleefully greeted as soon as the heroes were in sight. He looked like someone had taken a mail man and stuck a bunch of random gears and pipes into him. 

“Associate?” Honey Trap grumbled, raising his stinger.

“Ah, don’t shoot! I’m just _The Messenger_.” Said the akuma, with a little bow. “And do I have an important one for you!” Messenger reached into his bag and withdrew a large, stylized envelope. He opened the top and a sheet of paper flew out, floating before the two heroes. The letter crackled and an image began to play. 

“Ladybug, Honey Trap, Greetings.” Hawkmoth said. “This is a recording so do listen carefully because I will not be repeating myself should you try to interrupt.” Exchanging glances, Ladybug and Honey Trap focused on the message. 

“Upon receiving this message, you have one hour to bring me the Cat and Ladybug miraculous. If you don’t, well...we’ll find out if cats really do always land on their feet.” Hawkmoth stepped away from the camera to reveal Adrien in the grasp of a large Sentimonster, being held over the edge of a tall building. He looked tired and haggard, lifeless almost. Hawkmoth stepped back into view. “I’ll be waiting. Tick.  _ Tock. _ ”

As soon as the message ended, Messenger gasped and fell to the ground in pain as Hawkmoth recalled his akuma. Ladybug and Honey Trap stared at the confused postal worker with dread, and said;

“Well shit.”


	17. The final Salt down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The final battle between Hawkmoth and Ladybug (Featuring Honey Trap)

After returning the postal worker to their original location, Ladybug and Honey Trap reconvened on a rooftop.

“I recognize that building!” Ladybug said, “Let’s go ambush him!”

“That’s probably what he’s expecting though,” Honey Trap mulled, “I have an idea though.”

With a quick explanation, their plan was confirmed and put into motion.

\---

Hawkmoth glanced at the heroine as she landed.

“That was very close, Ladybug. You only had a short amount of time left.”

The press had gathered near the bottom of the building, recording the sentimonster holding the model hostage, along with the presumably final battle between good and evil.

“Now, the miraculous?” 

Ladybug settled herself into a fighting stance, “You must be insane if you think I’ll give them up just like that.”

Hawkmoth cackled, “Look at that Adrien, It seems your lady doesn’t care about you!” Adrien slumped further in the sentimonster’s hold. “Well, if that’s your choice.” He waved a hand.

The sentimonster released the boy. Ladybug didn’t flinch. She held trust in the other hero.

\---

Honey Trap quickly jumped from the next building’s rooftop to catch Adrien in his arms. 

He brought them down to the ground with a soft impact, “Hey, you’re okay now. Let’s get you back to your guardians.” With a quick look around, Honey Trap noticed the Gorilla standing near the edge of the crowd. He jumped over to him, placing Adrien on the ground, “Here. Take care of him.” 

Nathalie walked out from behind the Gorilla, “Thank you.”

Honey Trap’s breath caught in his throat.

If Nathalie wasn’t transformed, who was controlling the sentimonster? Or was it like The Collector where she made it then detransformed?

Not the time. He has to rejoin the fight.

\---

Hawkmoth and Ladybug took turns throwing and blocking blows.

“Give me your miraculous!” Ladybug shouted.

“That’s my line!” Hawkmoth snarled, reaching for her earrings. A top wrapped itself around his hand, stopping him in his tracks, and pulled back.

The adult turned to the offender, “You?!”

He could’ve sworn something was different about the outfit, but Hawkmoth didn’t have time to think about that right now. 

Honey Trap swung Hawkmoth in an overhead arch, slamming him down into the roof.

He simply untied the top from his hand, going back to attacking Ladybug.

Ladybug used her yo-yo to slap him away. Hawkmoth didn’t relent, slapping his cane into her face, knocking her to the floor. He kneeled over her, socking her all over her body. Her face, her arms, her torso, no part was left unbeaten.

She kicked him off her. He jumped back, landing on his feet. 

Honey Trap hid behind a box on the roof.

Guess it was time to use the plan.

Mullo flew out of his pocket, “Ready?”

Honey Trap nodded. “Pollen, Mullo, unify!”

The dual miraculous wielder, newly named Swarm, muttered his power’s activation phrase under his breath, “Multitude.”

Once the clones were finished splitting, one of them ran out towards the Hawkmoth and Ladybug scuffle.

“Venom!” He stuck his top into Hawkmoth’s leg, freezing him in place.

It was a wonder why the guardian kept sending out the Ladybug and Black Cat miraculous when the Bee one was so much more effective for taking care of the akumas.

Ladybug quickly took the brooch off of Hawkmoth whilst the rest of Swarm’s clones ran over.

“G-Gabriel Agreste?” She stuttered out as the clones watched, not quite forming together yet.

Ladybug steadied herself, still tired after the fight, “Nathalie has the peacock, doesn’t she?”

Despite only being able to show emotion through his eyes, she could see the relief in them. She was wrong then.

After the venom timer ran out, Gabriel started moving backwards. 

“You don’t understand!”

“Then help us understand!” Ladybug yelled back.

Swarm noticed how far back Gabriel was walking. Panicked, he started to form back into his full body, uncaring that it would start the 5 minute timer.

Ladybug took a step closer to him. 

Gabriel screamed, “Don’t get closer!”

His foot touched air instead of the floor. The man fell off the roof with a shocked look on his face, the look surely being mirrored on the two heroes’ faces.

Ladybug took a step forward, only to collapse to the ground from the injuries sustained during the battle. Swarm ran over to the roof edge, only to recoil when the sound of flesh hitting the pavement was heard.

Ladybug flinched, shifting into a sitting position, “I-Is he..?”

Swarm’s body shook, “Dead.”

“W-Why didn’t you catch-”

“Ladybug, I don’t have a miraculous most of the time,” He turned back to her, “I usually work from the shadows. Despite what you think, I’m not adept at wielding these kinds of powers. I can't react as fast as you.”

She let out a choked cry, “We let someone die.”

Swarm didn’t deny the statement, backing away from the edge of the roof.

A blue blur passed by them, snatching the butterfly miraculous from Ladybug’s hands.

They spun their heads to the person.

It was a peacock wielder, but obviously not Mayura with the gender change. The new wielder seemed to be a boy.

“W-Who?” Ladybug stuttered, forcing herself to stand up.

The person didn’t respond, only jumping off the roof, running off to who knows where.

Ladybug reached for her yo-yo, ready to chase after him, but Swarm stopped her, “You’re too tired.”

With that statement, his transformation dropped.

“We’re gonna have to leave that for another day.”

Ladybug’s only response was a broken sob.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ms.Kiesha? Ms.Kiesha? Oh my fucking god, she's fucking dead
> 
> Sorry for the wait I was procrastinating ✌️
> 
> Also can't write fight scenes sorry yall -UN


	18. Finally, something Sweet

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zAu9z2B1gcA is the Adrien mood for this, though it obviously isn't canon to this fic since Gabriel is dead and Adrien no longer has the cat, but the mood is there.

Once again at Nathaniel’s house, Marinette stared despondently into her mug of cooling tea. Tiki and Pollen sat on each shoulder, hugging her neck and giving comforting words. Nathaniel had his own cup, half drank. This was far from the first death he had witnessed (or even caused) in all his theoretical years as Bunnix’s assistant so he was handling this better. Marinette on the other hand had likely never experienced a death of someone she knew before. She was taking this hard. 

“Marinette-” Nathaniel began, but was cut off by an insistent pounding on the front door. He let the word hang in the air as he went to see what the visitor wanted. The kwami hid as you could see the table from the door as he opened it. Before he could get a single word out, Marc shoved past him to rush over to his cousin. 

“Are you okay? I saw the news.” He asked, pulling her into a hug. Marinette started to answer, but broke down crying instead. Marc murmured soothingly into her hair, and then glared at Nathaniel.

“If this was your plan all along, I _will_ stab you.” Marc hissed at him.

“I don’t know what you mean-” Nathaniel began, but Marc cut him off.

“Do I look stupid to you?!” He demanded. “You show up, Ladybug gets a new partner, Marinette is important enough to the timeline to warrant _miraculous_ intervention? I know she’s Ladybug and you’re the new bee.” He snapped. Nathaniel started to answer, then noticed something.

“What happened to your neck?” It looked like someone with very sharp teeth had chewed on it. Nathaniel would know because he had seen the same marks on himself in the mirror several times. From Kelpie. “Oh my god did you-?”

“Don’t change the subject!” Marc interjected.

“Oh god your neck!” Marinette sobbed out, becoming more distressed. Marc looked conflicted, torn between comforting her and continuing to scold Nathaniel.

“Kelpie, what the fuck!” Nathaniel whined, knowing the other man would hear him. Sure enough one of Bunnix’s time portals opened and the rabbit herself stepped out. The Nathaniel from this universe followed her, looking vaguely uncomfortable. He was studiously avoiding eye contact with Marc, face red. Kelpie was next, looking completely unrepentant. Not that it was easy to tell with his horse skull mask.

“What the _fuck_?” Time assistant Nathaniel questioned again. Marinette’s sobs had quieted and she was looking on in confusion. Pollen and Tiki had emerged from their hiding spots to watch the exchange.

“What? I got him to stop panting after you like a dog in heat. You’re welcome.” Kelpie huffed, crossing his arms. Marc flushed and looked like he was going to say something, but Bunnix cut him off.

“You guys can continue this later. Nathaniel, it’s time to go. The timeline is now on a steady course. Marinette,” She said, making her voice softer. “I’m sorry it ended like that, but you can’t hang up the Miraculous just yet. You know from our first meeting there is a Hawkmoth in the future.” Marinette nodded, pulling herself together.

“That new peacock wielder took the butterfly Miraculous before we could. He’s still out there.” She said, wiping off her face. 

“If Hawkmoth is going to return, you _really_ need to find your black cat, Marinette.” Tiki said.

“And a new rabbit holder.” Bunnix sighed. “Mini me has gone down the path of evil and even I don’t think trusting her again is a good idea. Don’t worry though, I have a suggestion for this one.” She said, shoving salt Nathaniel forward a step. He looked mildly bewildered. 

“Me?” He asked.

“Sure thing. You just spent twenty four or so hours of time in there and aren’t showing any signs of madness. That shows surprising mental fortitude, which the rabbit needs. Most people we have to knock out for their own sanity around the two hour mark. The burrow passively messes with your mind like that. Weight of the universe or something fancy like that.” Bunnix said, waving a hand.

“Wait a couple more years before giving him the rabbit though. The rabbit _requires_ a holder with no time limit, unlike the others who bond better if the host is younger when they first transform.” She added. Marinette nodded in understanding. 

“It will be your job to feed him up a bit. He is _way_ too skinny to sustain the strain of a Miraculous like the rabbit. No more depression fasting.” Kelpie said to Marc, while patting salt Nathaniel on the head.

“Oh don’t worry, I’ll keep him fed.” Marc purred suggestively, taking salt Nathaniel by the hand. “Just don’t try to ditch me again for a lying bitch and we’ll be just fine.” Salt Nathaniel muttered a small apology while time assistant Nathaniel mused at how _bold_ salt Marc was. Kelpie had been Marinette levels of unable to talk to him like a normal person when they first met. When they first started dating, Kelpie had nearly fainted just holding his hand, though he was more sure of himself in private as time went on. It wasn’t until after his Marc became Kelpie that he was confident in himself enough to be so upfront about his wants in public. When they spent longer periods of time in their own universe and not adventuring for Bunnix, he still got to see that sweet, shy side of his boyfriend and time assistant Nathaniel melted just thinking about it. God he loved that man.

“Don’t think we’re not going to talk about how you apparently got a piece from _yourself._ ” Time assistant Nathaniel said, walking over to stand with Bunnix and Kelpie. Marinette’s eyes widened as she connected the dots and gasped in surprise. Marc just shrugged and grinned. Salt Nathaniel went as red as his hair and stared at the ceiling like it was interesting. 

“Did you want to watch? He did.” Kelpie smirked, cocking his head towards salt Nathaniel. Time assistant Nathaniel gave a put upon sigh and handed the bee Miraculous back to Marinette. 

“Take care of yourself, alright? Maybe rescue your Nathaniel from his boyfriend every now and then. It’s sounding like he might need it.” Marinette laughed slightly and hugged him. 

“If you ever need to get away from _your_ boyfriend, feel free to drop in.” She said, though they both knew this was likely the last time they would ever see each other. Time assistant Nathaniel gave one last wave before he followed Bunnix and Kelpie into the burrow, the time portal closing behind him. 

“Hello Blanc.” He sighed as the white cat god latched onto him as soon as he was in the burrow. The god came and went, and was usually peaceable if they just let him hold Nathaniel like a security blanket. 

“So who _did_ become the new black cat in that universe?” Nathaniel questioned Bunnix as Blanc sniffed his hair.

“Well…”

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Several months had passed since time assistant Nathaniel had left their universe, and the one from her universe, Marc, and herself were starting at their new charter school. Marinette’s roommate was an upbeat girl who was excited to have a new friend, while Marc and Nathaniel had managed to get assigned to the same room. Which was probably a good thing since Marc had made good on his promise to take care of the other boy. Nathaniel was looking much healthier now that he was away from his negligent father, and was just overall happier. Marinette’s fashion line as MDC had really taken off, and she was set for university now money wise, and her line was still selling well. She had been talking with various clothing producers to outsource some of the sewing, as the demand had become far more than she could do alone.

Since they had missed most of the previous semester due to the ensuing drama, they had to repeat it, but none of them really minded. They could probably use the extra semester to get caught up since the educational quality was much better at this school than their old one. Today was the first day of the semester, and Marinette was paying more attention to her campus map than where she was going. So it wasn’t entirely surprising when she turned a corner and plowed head first into some poor boy.

“Oh my gosh! I’m so sorry!” She gasped, on her knees trying to gather up the various papers the two of them had dropped.

“Don’t worry about it, you were pretty obviously lost in thought.” The stranger said, gathering his things at a much calmer pace. “Are you lost? I saw your map.” 

“Just a little, this is my first day here.” Marinette admitted.

“It is mine as well.” The boy nodded slightly, coming to a decision. “Father instructed me to make friends, and we have common ground. Will you accept this charge?” He asked, sounding very high society. Marinette chuckled inwardly to herself, the boy reminded her of Kagami when they first met. 

“Of course. My name is Marinette. What’s yours?” She asked, taking the hand he offered to help her up. The boy blinked slowly, as if surprised she didn’t recognize him, before replying.

“Damian Wayne.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAH! This ENTIRE fic was written to get to that last line. Thanks for sticking with us, this IS the final chapter. This was always meant to be a parody but i got slightly out of hand. We hoped you enjoyed it!

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is a Collaborative effort between myself (Shadow), Username8746489 and Sinnamon_Troll
> 
> These guys are amazing, please give them the credit they deserve
> 
> Also, this Fic is based on an AU from a miraculous Discord server, if you're interested in joining just go here https://discord.gg/jC2j5SU ! Link does not expire!


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